Popular Eric "E" Murphy Quotes
Eric: What time is it?
Ari: It's time for you to wake the fuck up. I already shot a 72 bitch!
Eric: What on the front 9?
Ari: Yeah, that's funny cunty.
Turtle: It'll be like Prom.
Eric: So I guess you won't have a date then?
Turtle: I told you ten thousand fucking times, she had food poisoning.
Vince: I can't watch myself again.
Drama: I love watching myself.
Eric: Too bad the audience doesn't.
Ari: You think my assistant's hot?
Eric: Yeah, I do.
Ari: I think I'll hit that.
Eric: Scott relax, you said your dad's a diplomat right?
Scott Wick: That was fifty fucking years ago asshole!
Eric: Fiona just dropped the robe at the pool, and had nothing on underneath.
Turtle: She's naked at the pool?
Eric: Yeah.
Vince: And you were looking at her?
Eric: She's naked at the pool!
Drama: She thinks she's his trainer.
Eric: So do you.
Drama: What? I'm not? What the fuck did I get certified for then?
Ari: You know what they feed people on an indie set, Vinne? Nothing! They don't give you a trailer. They tell you to go sit on an apple box. Ever try to bang an extra on an apple box?
Eric: Well, if anybody could do it, Vince could.
Vince: I do have great balance.
Drama: I just got offered a job.
Eric: Nice buddy!
Drama: Yeah, as a fuckin waiter.
Turtle: I don't know Drama, that's a lot of responsibility. Maybe you should try out busboy first.
Drama: Hey, eat shit Turtle!
Ari: You deal with talent the same way that you deal with women. You have to make them believe that they need you more then you need them.
Eric: He doesn't need me that much.
Ari: Of course he doesn't need you. You're fucking worthless. I could get a million morons to come in here and do the job. That's not the point.
Eric: Then what is the point, Ari?
Ari: The point is that he is an insecure fuck, like all beautiful-but-handed-everything-on-a-silver-platter people. He doesn't trust anyone in this world but you. You've been born into royalty baby. You know it. Now you just gotta be thankful, and wear the crown.
Ari: From now on ask my permission before you bang one of my assistants.
Eric: How'd you know that?
Ari: 'Cause I know all. And I could have told you that this would end badly. Now I gotta go fire her so you don't feel weird.
Eric: No. Don't fire her.
Ari: All right. Well, I'll just sexually harass her until she quits.
Turtle: Kristin's fucking Vince Vaughn!
Eric: What are you talking about? She's back with that restaurant guy...
Turtle: She was in the middle of 40 Deuce with her hands down Vince Vaughn's pants.
Eric: She had her hands down his pants?!
Drama: Yeah, both of 'em.
Eric: Vince Vaughn?! That puffy motherfucker?!
Drama: Nah, bro, he didn't look puffy at all. He was looking real good.
Turtle: Yeah, it was kinda like "Swingers" Vince Vaughn, not Old School Vince Vaughn... it's kinda like New School Vince Vaughn
