Lucille: How's my son?
Doctor: He's going to be all right.
Lindsay Funke: Finally some good news from this guy.
George Michael Bluth: There's no other way to take that.
Doctor: That's a great attitude. I got to tell you, if I was getting this news, I don't know that I'd take it this well.
Lucille: But you said he was all right.
Doctor: Yes, he's lost his left hand. So he's going to be "all right."
Lucille: [Jumping on the doctor] You son of a bitch! I hate this doctor!

Lindsay: That's the first time we're in the shower since our honeymoon.
Tobias: And this time no tears!

Lindsay: Well Gob doesn't do anything for the family...
Gob: Hey... I'm f(bleep)ing Lucille 2!
Lindsay: Ohh.. I could do something like that...

Michael: If you had tried and failed, I'd understand, but you didn't even try.
Lindsay: So I didn't even fail, and I don't see you giving me credit for that.

Michael: It all makes sense. Why else would Sally Sitwell be avoiding me?
Lindsay: Because she thinks you're a loser.
Gob: And why would Lucille 2 be so distant toward me?
Lindsay: Because she knows you're a loser.

Michael: You were not on a date with Dragon.
Lindsay: I know that, Michael. It was pretty obvious when Dragon kept swooping Uncle Jack in for a kiss.

I'm going to see if I can get a wrench to strip my nuts. (everyone looks at her) ... I was trying to be sexy, it just got away from me.

Lindsay: I have the afternoon free.
Lucille: Really? Did 'nothing' cancel?

Lindsay: What happened to you?
Tobias: (with a bandage wrap on his head) What? Oh, oh! My ears. The doctor said I can't go to sleep for five hours, or I might die or something. (to George Michael) Oh! I got blown! So, I can't sleep!

Maeby: What? So, I'm not invited to the Bluth Company Christmas party?
Lindsay: Oh, honey, of course you can go if you want to.
Maeby: Thanks, Mom.
Lindsay: No, you're not going to that. You see, if I show up with you, it'll just make me seem like I'm a mother.
Maeby: I've never thought of you that way.

Lindsay: (regarding Tobias and their open marriage) I wonder how many women he's slept with, if any.
Michael: Lindsay, it's not a competition.
Lindsay: Of course it is, Michael. That's why they call it 'scoring'.
Michael: Maybe in the '70s.
Lindsay: That many? We've only been doing this for a month.

Michael: You know, instead of competing with Tobias, why don't you try just spending a little bit more time with your daughter?
Lindsay: Why? Tobias doing that?

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 162 in total

Arrested Development Quotes

(holding stuffed animals) These are my awards, Mother. From Army. The seal is for marksmanship, and the gorilla is for sand racing. Now if you'll excuse me, they're putting me in something called Hero Squad.

Buster

Oh, mercy me! I forgot that we were in the colonies.

Mrs. Featherbottom
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