Arrested Development

Michael Quotes (Page 10)

George Michael: I'm just in the middle of a stupid girl problem. That's all.
Michael: I don't even have a girl, much less a stupid one.
George Michael: No, the problem is stupid; the girl isn't stupid.
Narrator: But if they ever had a child, it would be. Because the girl was his cousin Maeby.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: I -- I was wondering if you might be willing to go somewhere with me? I -- I will pay you.
Rita: ... You'll pay me?
Michael: Not ... Not for sex. You're gonna think that I'm Jack the Ripper, right? Didn't he kill prostitutes, or ...
Rita: I'm not a prostitute.
Michael: And I shall let you live ... haha. This is my worst hello.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: Pre-schools just go half-day, right? And I'm not trying to pick you up, but is there any way that I can, I can come by, pick you up, and bring you here?
Rita: Yeah, I, um, I suppose I could sneak out at nap time.
Michael: Yes? Perfect, great. And I shall drop you off alive, hooker or no. (mouths 'What is wrong with me?' as he walks off)
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: You seem more villainous than usual, Mom. Are you sober?
Lucille: Michael, it's 8 AM!
Michael: So, it's not that.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Lucille: I just went off my post-partum depression medication.
Michael: You're still taking that? You had Buster thirty-two years ago.
Lucille: And that's how long I've been depressed about it.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: Uncle Oscar can last one more day in prison.
Narrator: Not according to that day's blog at ImOscar.com.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: Hey, why don't you pop a tent in front with your cousin Maeby?
George Michael: What? No!
Maeby: I'm not really the outdoorsy type.
Michael: Well, this is a good chance for you to rub off on her.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: Dad's in Reno, Kitty's in Reno, Dad's in Kitty and he must he a blue man.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Oscar: I even started a website: I'm Oscar dot com. I'm innocent, Michael! I'm Oscar! Dot com!
Michael: No, no, don't buy it. I'm taking my son to the cabin, and there's nothing you can say to make me believe that you are not my father.
Oscar: I understand. Your child comes first.
Michael: Oh, my god, you're Oscar.
Oscar: Dot com.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

(Michael arrives at the office where Lindsay rides up to him on a photocopier)
Lindsay: We did it, Mikey! We're super rich again! And I'm gonna buy a car, the Volvo.
(She hands him a piece of paper from the photocopier)
Michael: N ... Lindsay, you're not going to start spending money. And this is not a Volvo.
Lindsay: Oh, that's from sitting on the copier.
(She grabs the sheet back)
 • Rating: Unrated

Are we missing your favorite quote from "?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!