Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

You did one production of Godspell in a barn. You're barn folk!

Mitchell: She wants us to buy Lily a Blackberry.
Cam: She doesn't have the dexterity for that!

Leave it to the gays to raise the only underachieving Asian in America.

Cam: I hate your beard.
Mitchell: Wow, you had that bullet in the chamber.

Where was all this conscience when I got us into the first-class lounge in the airport and you chewed Angela Lansbury's ear off?

You're like a mob wife. You complain about what I do, but have no problem wearing the fur that fell off the back of the truck.

If we're found dressed like this, it won't look good for the gays.

He's managed to make a gay couple hate brunch.

Mitchell: Nobody kisses at a bowling alley!
Cam: I almost got a turkey!

Don't carry me out this time, I think it sends the wrong message to Lily.

I know I'm not the handiest guy, but I'm still a man and I want to be able to look out into my yard and say, 'There's a little bit of me in that princess castle.

Mitchell: Aren't you going to change into a working man's outfit?
Cameron: I don't think workmen really call them outfits.

Displaying quotes 97 - 108 of 152 in total

Modern Family Quotes

I'll admit it. I'm turned on by powerful women.
Michelle Obama, Oprah, Condoleezza Rice, Serena Williams… Wait a minute.

Phil Dunphy

Just so you know sometimes when babies come this early, they're black.

Sal
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