Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCPhil Dunphy Quotes
Phil: Wow, this place has really changed. Time marches on, huh? See that Starbucks down there, you know what that used to be?
Luke: An orange grove?
Phil: No, a Burger King. You can still see some of the architecture.
In your face, girl with a negative tattoo.
Angela Lansbury was the grand marshal. Good times she wrote.
You can insult a lot of things about me - my hair, my voice, my balance-board exercises - but don't insult my selling. That crosses a line. What line? Oh, you don't see it? That's because I just sold it!
Put the 'he' in 'hero,' son.
Claire's a perfectionist, which sometimes is a good thing, like when it comes to picking a husband.
What people do in the privacy of their own sports arena should be their own business.
I brought my own snacks, not because I'm cheap — it's a matter of principle. Plus I get a little rush from the danger. Be cool, be cool, be cool! Just look straight ahead... I've never felt more alive. WoOo!
Ordinarily I'm a rule follower, but when someone tells me I can't bring my own snacks into their stadium? That's when I get a little... nuts. It's a free country right? Let's just say it Ruffles me when some Goobers tell me I have to spend my half my PayDay on their hot dogs.
Claire: I got pregnant with Haley.
Phil: My bad!
Phil: Just to be clear, I'm not condoning eating your kids, but I sure as heck know why giraffes do it.
Claire: What?!?
There she is. The prettiest white woman on Maui.
