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Why's she teaching Spanish if she's a doctor? Go cure something.

Troy: I want TBD. Is that new?
Pierce: If it's what I think, I had it for about a month in the '70s.

They're making us walk around with pretzels in our butts, and I put mustard on mine like an idiot.

My uncle was struck by lightning. You'd think it would give you superpowers, but now he just masturbates in movie theaters.

Troy: He released Annie's Boobs. Annie's Boobs could be anywhere.
Shirley: We get it! You named your monkey Annie's Boobs.

Can we make this quick? I have to give a banana to Annie's Boobs.

Troy: I think I'm failing psychopharmacology.
Britta: Why are you taking that?
Troy: I thought it was a class about crazy farm animals.

If God were edible - not that I'm Catholic - but if it was cool to eat God, he'd be a chicken finger.

Jeff: Why do you have a monkey?
Troy: It's an animal that looks like a dude. Why don't I have 10 of them?

I gotta stop hanging out with her. She sounds like a chicken finger.

It's not a meteor; it's a cookie wand. Me and Jeff made it because it made you look more like the Cookie Crisp wizard, which is not even a reference I get because the Cookie Crisp mascot when I was growing up wasn't a wizard. It was a burglar.

You're more of a fun vampire. You don't suck blood, you just suck.

Displaying quotes 109 - 120 of 150 in total

Community Quotes

Sensible night, appropriate night.
Snow on ground, left and right.
Round yon purchase of decorative things.
Tolerant rewrite of carols to sing.
Function with relative ease,
Function with relative ease.

Shirley [sung to the tune of "Silent Night"]

Annie: The midterm dance will need a visual theme. Like, 'Let's blow off steam,' and it's trains!
Chang: I have an idea!
Annie: Chang, your last idea was to murder.