Jimbo: Alright, so far everyone has a long piece of straw. We'll keep drawing (Jimbo picks a piece of straw.) Jimbo: (relieved) Whew! (Mr. Garrison picks a piece of straw.) Mr. Garrison: (relieved) Whew! (Officer Barbrady looks at the last piece of straw in his hands.) Officer Barbrady: Whew. Jimbo: Wait a minute! Where the hell is the short one?? Officer Barbrady: The short what? Jimbo: Damn it, Barbrady! When you draw straws, you're supposed to have one of them short! That's how you decide who loses! Officer Barbrady: That's not how I played it Mr. Garrison: Oooh, can we hurry this up? My stomach is growling
Chef: Doctor, we've got a shot-cracker outside! Doctor: I'll be right with you in a minute, right after I inject this man with a long needle. Stan: Oh, man. I'm gonna be sick... Doctor: There there, young man. Medical science is nothing to be afraid of. (injects the needle and Stan groans) Nurse: Ooh, I think you're hitting the bone... (Stan groans again.) Doctor: Yes, I can feel the needle scraping in there. (The patient starts bleeding.) Doctor: Oop! He's hemorrhaging. (Blood lands near Stan as he leaps away and shrieks; the patients head then falls off.) Doctor: Oop! His head fell off! Stan: (running away) I'm getting outta here! Kyle: Stan! Doctor: Well, some people just have a weak stomach.