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Johnny Cochran: Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, Chef's attorney would certainly want you to believe that his client wrote "Stinky Britches" ten years ago. And they make a good case. Hell, I almost felt pity myself! But, ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a wookie from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about that; that does not make sense!
Gerald: Dammit!
Chef: What?
Gerald: He's using the Chewbacca Defense!
Johnny Cochran: Why would a wookie, an 8 foot tall wookie, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of two foot tall ewoks? That does not make sense! But more importantly, you have to ask yourself, 'what does that have to do with this case?' Nothing. Ladies and Gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case. It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.


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Related Quotes:
South Park Quotes, South Park Season 2 Episode 14 Quotes, Chef Quotes
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South Park Season 2 Episode 14 Quotes

Look at the monkey. Look at the silly little monkey. (Juror's head explodes)

Johnnie Cochran

Mr. Garrison: Mr- Mr. Twig, are you OK? Mr- Mr. Twig?
(He lifts up the covers and notices Mr. Twig broken)
Mr. Garrison: (Screams) MR. TWIG IS BROKEN IN HALF!! WHO DID THIS!? YOU WON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS, YOU BASTARD!!

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