Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXPopular Family Guy Quotes
Oh god how do you get pink-eye? This is got to be it!
Peter
Peter: I missed you Brian.
Brian: I missed you too Peter.
Peter: And now Im gonna go upstairs and pee in Meg's bed.
Brian: No, we're going to go pee in Meg's bed.
Peter: Good boy.
Brian: Well I don't know if I'd label myself a drinker. I know I like a cold beer after I mow the lawn.
Peter: There were three lies in that sentence.
Oh yeah 'cause you know him so well, shut your faaaaaace.
Stewie
Neil: Is this a nut free counter?
Chris: Uh I don't know, my dad's might have been on there at some point.
Stewie: Yes looks like someone's gone at him with a whip.
Brian: That is a perfectly valid way of saying that. Bravo master.
Stewie: Master? Aaand a surprisingly quick erection for Stewie.
Hey? You up? Guess where I have a crayon?
Stewie (seductively to a little girl at nap time in school)
Ugggh! This tastes like Ani DiFranco after a bike ride!
Quagmire (referencing an awful Korean Taco)
How do you think NBA players get all those chicks? They're all great cooks. Except Kobe Bryant. His secret is different.
Quagmire
God he must be the coolest fat guy in a train conductor's cap in the world!
Brian (referring to George R. R. Martin)
Tom Cruise: Nobody walks away from tiny Tom Cruise.
Stewie: Yeah, except for all three of your wives.
You know, it's times like this where I think if I didn't talk and you were a normal baby, we wouldn't have any of these problems.
Brian
