Friends Season 1 Quotes
Ethan: Uh, before we get into any staying-over stuff, there is something you should know.
Monica: Okay, is this like, "I have an early class tomorrow," or, "I'm secretly married to a goat?"
- Permalink: Uh, before we get into any staying-over stuff, there is somethin...
Joey: What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
Monica: Is it, like, for dinosaur emergencies? "Help! Come quick, they're still extinct!"
- Permalink: What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for? Is it, ...
Ross: (About his new beeper) No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. I mean, all she has to do is to dial 55-JIMBO.
Chandler: A cool phone number, and a possible name for the kid.
- Permalink: No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever...
Phoebe: Can you see me operating a drill press?
Joey: I don't know. What are you wearing?
- Permalink: Can you see me operating a drill press? I don't know. What are...
Ross: Monica, let's go! Come on people! Woman in labor!
Chandler: (Doing a little dance) Hey Ross, look what I got going.
Ross: Save it for the cab. What are you going? We're going to a hospital!
Rachel: (Putting on makeup) What? So I can't look nice? There are doctors there.
Ross: Joey, get out of the fridge!
Joey: All right, all right!
Ross: What is that?
Joey: For the ride.
Chandler: Like a cab--
Ross: Save it!
Chandler: Okay, hating this!
Ross:Monica, come one, now! Let's go! Baby coming!
Monica: I can't believe I'm going to be an aunt! I'll have a nephew.
Ross: That's nice. Get out!
- Permalink: Monica, let's go! Come on people! Woman in labor! Hey Ross, l...
Chandler: Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream.
Rachel: No, forget it.
Chandler: Oh, why not. Was I doing anything particularly... saucy?
Rachel: All right, fine. Um, you were not the only one there. Joey was there too.
Joey: All right.
Ross: Was there... uh, huh, huh, huh... anybody, anybody else there?
Ross: You're sure? Nobody, uh, handed out, uh, mints or anything?
- Permalink: Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream. No, forget it. ...
Monica: You have got to do something about the humping!
Ross: What? It's just a phase.
Chandler: Well, that's what we said about Joey.
- Permalink: You have got to do something about the humping! What? It's jus...
Chandler: Joe... Joe... Joe... Stalin?
Joey: Stalin! Stalin. Do I know that name? It sounds familiar.
Chandler: Well, it does not ring a bell with me!
Joey: Joe Stalin. You know, that's pretty good!
Chandler: Hey, you know, you might wanna try Joseph.
Joey: Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that!
- Permalink: Joe... Joe... Joe... Stalin? Stalin! Stalin. Do I know that na...
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said you only had to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: Still, it's just such reckless spending.
Ross: I think when somebody steals your credit card they've kind of already thrown caution to the wind.
- Permalink: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said you onl...
Chandler: (About Marcel) How can he be an adult already?
Ross: I know. One day he's this little thing. Then he's this little thing that I can't get off my leg.
- Permalink: How can he be an adult already? I know. One day he's this litt...
Joey: You know there already is a Joseph Stalin?!
Chandler: You're kidding!
Joey: Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that!
Chandler: Ya know, you'd think I would have.
- Permalink: You know there already is a Joseph Stalin?! You're kidding! ...
Phoebe: We found her. We found the girl.
Joey: Did you call the cops?
Rachel: Nope. We took her to lunch.
Chandler: Oh, your own brand of vigilante justice?
- Permalink: We found her. We found the girl. Did you call the cops? Nope...
Monica: Hey, Joey! What would you do if you were omnipotent?
Joey: Probably kill myself.
Monica: Excuse me?
Joey: Hey, if Little Joey's dead, I got no reason to live.
Ross: Uh Joey... omnipotent.
Joey: You are? I'm so sorry. (To Chandler) I didn't know, I thought it was one of those theoretical questions.
- Permalink: Hey, Joey! What would you do if you were omnipotent? Probably...
Phoebe: Okay, Joey, your bet.
Joey: I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face. (The girls look at him, confused.) Oh, I'm out.
- Permalink: Okay, Joey, your bet. I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit i...