Friends

Friends Season 1 Quotes (Page 6)

Season 1 Episode 20: "The One with the Evil Orthodontist"

Chandler: I am telling you, years from now, schoolchildren will study it as one of the greatest first dates of all time. It was unbelievable! We could totally be ourselves, we didn't have to play any games...
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: Then we took a walk down to Bendel's. And I told him not to, but he got me a little bottle of Chanel.
Ross: That's nice... Now, was that before or after you told him to stop calling, stop sending you flowers, and to generally leave you alone?
Rachel: Right, well, we never actually got to that... Oh, it was just so nice to see him again, ya know? It was comfortable, it was familiar... it was just nice!
Ross: That's, that's nice twice!
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: (Looking out the window) Look look! He's doing it again, the guy with the telescope!
Phoebe: Oh, my God! Go away! (Waving her arms) Stop looking in here!
Monica: Great, now he's waving back.
Joey: Man, we gotta do something about that guy. This morning, I caught him looking into our apartment. It creeps me out! I feel like I can't do stuff!
Monica: What kinda stuff...?
Joey: Will you grow up? I'm not talking about sexy stuff, but, like, when I'm cooking naked.
Phoebe: You cook naked?
Joey: Yeah, toast, oatmeal... nothing that spatters.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: I'm going to the bathroom. Will you watch my phone?
Monica: Why not take it with you?
Chandler: Hey, we haven't been on a second date, and she needs to hear me pee?
Monica: Why don't you just call her?
Chandler: I can't call her. I left a message. I have some pride.
Monica: Do you?
Chandler: No!
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: She's on the other line, she's going to call me be back. She's on the other line, she's going to call me be back. (Dancing)
Monica: Don't you have to pee?
Chandler: That's why I'm dancing.
 • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0

Rachel: (To Monica, quietly) We ended up having sex in his chair.
Monica: (Loudly) You had sex in his chair?!... I said that a little too loudly, didn't I?
Ross: You, you had what?
Phoebe: Sex in his chair.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 1 Episode 19: "The One Where the Monkey Gets Away"

Monica: Pheebs? You know how we talked about saying things quietly to yourself first?
Phoebe: Yes, but there's not always time.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: I figured after work, I'd pick up a bottle of wine, go over there, and try to... woo her.
Chandler: Hey, you know what you should do? Take her back to the 1980's when that phrase was last used.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ross: I've gotta go. Come on, Marcel! Come on! We're gonna go and take a bath. Yes we are, aren't we? Yes, we are.
Chandler: They're still just friends, right?
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: Well, I think it's perfect. You know. It's just gonna be the two of us. She spent all day taking care of my monkey.
Chandler: I can't remember the last time I got a girl to take care of my monkey.
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: Oh, this is so intense. One side of my butt is totally asleep, and the other side has no idea.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chandler: Yeah, well I went to boarding school with four hundred boys. Any sex I had would've involved a major lifestyle choice.
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: It would be different if I had somebody.
Ross: Really? What happened to, "forget relationships, I'm done with men"? The whole penis embargo?
 • Rating: Unrated

Louisa: Are you aware that possession of an illegal exotic is punishable by up to four years in prison and confiscation of the animal?
Phoebe: Oh my God! You'd put that poor little creature in jail?
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: Don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel they would've happened already?
Ross: I'm telling you. She said she's looking for a relationship with someone exactly like me.
Joey: She really said that?
Ross: Well, I added the "exactly like me" part.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: (About Phoebe screaming) What?!
Phoebe: Something just brushed up my right leg!
Monica: What was it?
Phoebe: Oh that's okay, it was just my left leg.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Rachel: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
Monica: Oh good! 'Cause where else would we get any?
 • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0

Rachel: Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for inspiration. Oh, my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!
Monica: Barry who you almost--?
Rachel: Barry who I almost.
Monica: And Mindy, your maid of--?
Rachel: Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: He pooped in my shoe? Which one?
Rachel: I don't know. The left one.
Monica: Which ones?
Rachel: Oh. Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything.
Phoebe: (Entering the apartment) Hey.
All: Hi.
Phoebe: Whoa, ooh, why is the air in here so negative?
Chandler: Rachel lost Marcel.
Phoebe: Oh no, how?
Monica: He, he pooped in my shoe.
Phoebe: Which one?
Monica: Those cute little black ones I wear all the time.
Phoebe: No, which one? The right or left? 'Cause the left one is lucky...
 • Rating: Unrated

Luisa: Luisa Gianetti! Lincoln High? I sat behind you guys in home room!
Rachel: Luisa? Oh, my God! Monica! It's Luisa!
Monica: The Luisa from home room!
Rachel: Yes!
Luisa: You have no idea who I am, do you?
Monica: No, none at all.
 • Rating: Unrated

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