How I Met Your Mother

Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
How i met your mother
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You've been pork free so long you're practically kosher.


She had a nice face, her booty was in place, but Barney don't chase.


She was a really great Lazer Tag partner. She's tiny so she's allowed to push kids.


Desperation Day had come and gone and you have neither gone nor come.


So that's it? A couple of white Urkels offer you sausages and you're gone?


Umm, is it getting crowded in here, because I think there are two peas in this pod?


And she sticks the landing, why don't you start stretching and I'll be right back.


Barney: Please, you might as well be dog-earing a tear stained bridal magazine while wolfing down the box of chocolates you had delivered to yourself at work from your fiancé that no one has ever met.
Bev: Gerard is real!

Ted: They're actually called British Morning Socks.
Zoë: Don't get in your own way!

Mom I hate to be that guy, but I'm pretty sure it was hot pocket o'clock like ten minutes ago.


February 13th, a magical night, where a Ten has the self esteem of a four and the depraved enthusiasm of a Two.


Whoa check out that one! Her body is a perfect X.

Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 256 in total

How I Met Your Mother Season 6 Quotes

Robin: Ted, the future is scary. But you can't just run back to the past because it's familiar. Yes, it's tempting...
Barney: But it's a mistake.

Sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better things...we're done here.