How I Met Your Mother

Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
How i met your mother
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OK after Thanksgiving I'm cutting out carbs.

Marshall

If we're together long enough I hope that one day you see yourself like I do.

Kevin

Uh lets see, suits, laser tag, I say "wait for it" a lot, that's pretty much it.

Barney

Robin: I'm such a mess. Why do you even like me?
Barney: I guess cause you're almost as messed up as I am.

Barney: What's that saying about two wrongs making a right?
Robin: Two wrongs don't make a right?
Barney: No that's not it.

Hey dude fork over those nachos...

Marshall

I think that sandwich was laced with other stuff...like hard meats.

Marshall

Lily: Marshall, your insurance doesn't kick in till tomorrow.
Marshall: Yeah well you know what? Life kicks in right now!

Hey, it's been no picnic for me either. You don't even do the voices.

Marshall

I'm going to like the way I look. I guarantee it.

Barney

You may knot, with a K. A little tie pun.

Marshall

Nobody wakes up and says "today I'm going to star in a YouTube video!"

Marshall
Displaying quotes 85 - 96 of 156 in total

How I Met Your Mother Season 7 Quotes

Wow Marshall really took a two-flusher on that one!

Ted

Oh thank God! Barney Stinson needs you right before his wedding, you assume there's at least one dead stripper in the closet.

Ted
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