One gets over a watch. You never get over a loved one.

Ziva

That sex offender website makes it damn hard to meet chics!

John Stevens

I appreciate that, Tony, but don't try to compete with my Schmeil.

Ziva

Male friends only want to sleep with you. Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan, When Harry Met Sally.

Tony

No name, but Marge Simpson was a regular.

DiNozzo

Agent Gibbs, you are one bad-ass!

Captain Wescott

Hey, the Opera is one of the big three!

McGee

Gibbs: I'm on the other side now. I tried to catch Wescott, he wouldn't let me.
Ducky: No, you can't Gibbs, but you can call him.

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott

We don't have to grow up all at once, and we are who we are. But there is such a thing as balance and it can be achieved while being true to our own nature.

Ziva

Tony: It's like looking for a needle in a haystack.
Ziva: Why would anyone out a needle in a sack of hay anyways?

Tony: In fact, I was champion of my Baltimore precinct in the late '90s.
Ziva: (laughing) 'Late '90s?' That makes you sound...
Tony: What, old?! Don't say old!
Ziva: I didn't say it, you did.

NCIS Quotes

[voiceover] Anyone can achieve their fullest potential, who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of others to set the frontiers of our destiny. Your destiny can't be changed but, it can be challenged. Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one.

McGee

Abby: It's okay. Breena's fine. Breathe. Good. Now hurry up and get to the hospital because Breena is in labor.
McGee: Jimmy? Did you hear what she said? She just said Breena's having a baby. I think you broke him.