One gets over a watch. You never get over a loved one.

Ziva

That sex offender website makes it damn hard to meet chics!

John Stevens

I appreciate that, Tony, but don't try to compete with my Schmeil.

Ziva

Male friends only want to sleep with you. Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan, When Harry Met Sally.

Tony

No name, but Marge Simpson was a regular.

DiNozzo

Agent Gibbs, you are one bad-ass!

Captain Wescott

Hey, the Opera is one of the big three!

McGee

Gibbs: I'm on the other side now. I tried to catch Wescott, he wouldn't let me.
Ducky: No, you can't Gibbs, but you can call him.

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott

We don't have to grow up all at once, and we are who we are. But there is such a thing as balance and it can be achieved while being true to our own nature.

Ziva

Tony: It's like looking for a needle in a haystack.
Ziva: Why would anyone out a needle in a sack of hay anyways?

Tony: In fact, I was champion of my Baltimore precinct in the late '90s.
Ziva: (laughing) 'Late '90s?' That makes you sound...
Tony: What, old?! Don't say old!
Ziva: I didn't say it, you did.

NCIS Quotes

Gibbs: Why use kids?
Rousseau: Why do fish swim? For the same reason disenfranchised children rise up to find their purpose. They simply must. It is inevitable.

Keates: Spider?
Tony: Keates?
Gibbs: You know her?
Tony: Um, well I..in a sort of...yeah. She's Philly PD.
Keates: She was. She's ATF now. Special Agent Zoe Keates. You want to get that gun out of my face and come over here and give me a hug?