You want your pills? You can go stick your head in the toilet. There might still be a few floating around.

Red

• Permalink: You want your pills? You can go stick your head in the toilet. There might still be a few...
• Rating: Unrated

Healy: Alex Vause is sick. I get you. You're not like her.
Piper: The only sicko here, is you.

• Permalink: The only sicko here, is you.
• Rating: Unrated

I swear to God, if they let me out of here, I will shut up. I will shut up and I will put my head down and I will do my time and I will smile at Healy and I won't go near him. I can do that. But please don't leave me here. Please.

Piper

• Permalink: I swear to God, if they let me out of here, I will shut up. I will shut up and I will put my...
• Rating: Unrated

Alex: It doesn't feel right to be eating while she's in there.
Nicky: Straight girls. They'll f*ck you up every time.

• Permalink: Straight girls. They'll f*ck you up every time.
• Rating: Unrated

Piper: I'm coming I'm coming I'm coming I'm coming...
Alex: Shhhh... show don't tell.

• Permalink: Shhhh... show don't tell.
• Rating: Unrated

Piper: She's a weird girl.
Poussey: Yeah "you gonna die" is really vague. Like totally open for interpretation.

• Permalink: Yeah "you gonna die" is really vague. Like totally open for interpretation.
• Rating: Unrated

Snazzy told me a story about a girl named Piper. She could blow out candles with her coochie.

Inmate

• Permalink: Snazzy told me a story about a girl named Piper. She could blow out candles with her coochie.
• Rating: Unrated

Yeah, but what about my safety if I testify? This guy is the real deal and from what I've seen on The Sopranos they don't take too kindly to those they consider traitors. They hire killers with underwear fetishes to take them out.

Piper

• Permalink: Yeah, but what about my safety if I testify? This guy is the real deal and from what I've...
• Rating: Unrated

Aleida: How come you ain't in jail Luschek?
Luschek: I am in jail. Every f*ckin' day.

• Permalink: I am in jail. Every f*ckin' day.
• Rating: Unrated

You know I can promise you that I've never been more saner than I am right now.

Pennsatucky

• Permalink: You know I can promise you that I've never been more saner than I am right now.
• Rating: Unrated

I made her come vaginally. Do you even know how hard that is to do? My point is...I don't even know what my point is anymore.

Larry

• Permalink: I made her come vaginally. Do you even know how hard that is to do? My point is...I don't...
• Rating: Unrated

Larry: Dad, why did you bring us to a gay bath house?
Howard: It's a nice place. It's clean. A schvitz is a schvitz. [moaning from the others] I had a Groupon.
Larry: Aaaah.

• Permalink: Aaaah.
• Rating: Unrated