Popular Scrubs Quotes
Listen up, Interns! Notice the definition in the upper calf. (Lifts pant leg to reveal his oddly youthful legs) Look at it, damnit! See that. Back in 'Nam the choppers used to hover about eight feet over my head and I'd jump in. You should have seen the look on Charlie's face. (To Rex) Not the enemy, son. The pilot, Charlie-horse. Great guy. He didn't make it back. Where's the cake?
Dr. Kelso
Carla: Kelso's gonna kill me. I can't find Mr. Sommers.
Janitor: Did you look between Mr. Spring and Mr. Fall? Ha ha, too easy.
Carla: Hey, J.D. Turns out Mr. Milligan doesn't have insurance. Dr. Kelso said once he's stable we have to bounce him to County. Sorry.
J.D.: Turk! Hey! If you go talk to Kelso for me, I'll give you this special Christmas gum.
J.D.'s Narration: Okay, this is actually Mrs. Cross's medicated denture gum? So you have to sell it with your eyes. Sell it... Sell it...!
Turk: Okay.
Turk: Elliot! You said you were gonna get that CAT-scan of Mrs. Credin's abdomen.
Elliot: I have been crazy-busy. I was stuck on the phone all morning with bill collectors who, by the way, are obsessed with money! I spent an hour in my truck looking for clean bras because all I've got left is this date-night push-up one - and, to be honest, I don't like working with these things under my chin all day. Plus, I am walking someplace right now, and, for the life of me, I can't remember where.
Turk: Don't worry about it, I'll take care of it for you.
Elliot: Thanks.
Turk: Mm-hmm.
Elliot: Bathroom!
Elliot, maybe you should be the one to open Jake up? You know like Turk can be a little...immature - you know, like I always have to talk about my feelings over dinner or shut off his iPod during sex.
Carla
Elliot: Laverne, did you ever notice that in hospitals, even though you're surrounded by like hundreds of people, it's still so easy to get lost in your own thoughts?
Laverne: Have you been drinkin'?
Turk: So, who'd you side with, Elliot or Alex?
J.D.: Neither; I just pretended I was paged, and then when they said they didn't hear anything, I called them both liars and ran away.
Turk: Smooth.
J.D.: Yeah. It's just, you know, they both have a point...
Turk: Stick to the booty principle.
J.D.: What's that?
Turk: The booty principle: Which one do you want to sleep with?
J.D.: Alex.
Turk: Then I think she might be right
Dr. Cox: (Talking to Elliots interns about her relationship with Keith) I wanna hear from the audience, I do. Dating in the work place: She's the boss, he's the pretty intern.
Tell me whats buggin' you! Courage!
Gloria: Hmm.. Sometimes they arrive in the morning and they smell like sex.
Billy: Go travelin' to Texas, you know? Go line dancing with some married women that wish they weren't married. You never know what life would put in your lap when you open your arms and embrace it!
J.D.: "You'll be surprised what'll fall in your lap if you open up and embrace life..."
Carla: Okay, maybe I'm guilty of a lie of omission.
Turk: 'Cause you're a lie omitter!
Janitor:We don't just rock together, we roll together.
Janitor, Lloyd, Ted, Turk: ::pounding chests:: Cool cats.
Elliot: Oh, first I've gotta discharge Mr. Hale, then get a extropolenscopy on Mrs. Peterson, and then, to be perfectly frank, perform a thong extrication on Ms. Reid.
Doug: Hey, your last name is Reid!
Elliot: Doug. I have underwear in my butt.
