Scrubs Season 4 Quotes
Elliot: I've never connected with a guy like this before. I mean, even though it's only been two weeks, I already feel like I know Jake better than I know myself.
Carla: What does he do for a living?
Elliot: I should know that.
- Permalink: I've never connected with a guy like this before. I mean, even t...
Turk: What's the sex like?
Elliot: What makes you think that I have slept with him?
Dr. Kelso: For starters, you've known him more than ten minutes.
- Permalink: What's the sex like? What makes you think that I have slept wi...
Honestly, it was like Death and I had a staring match, and, well, Death blinked. Now, all of you know I'm not one to toot my own horn, but, uh... beep, beepDr. Cox
- Permalink: Honestly, it was like Death and I had a staring match, and, well...
Elliot: Oh God.
Jake: What is it?
Elliot: I just locked the door when a black guy walked by. Now he's gonna think that I think he's dangerous 'cause he's black; and not just black, but with an actual 'fro and everything - which, trust me, I don't find scary at all. Not like the zigzags and the cornrows and stuff. My life's ruined!
- Permalink: Oh God. What is it? I just locked the door when a black guy ...
Jake: Elliot, please, look, everybody has their stuff. 'Kay, like me. I'm an emotional person, but I've always had trouble expressing it. Well, here, tell me... tell me you like my shirt.
Elliot: I like your shirt.
Jake: Cool. Okay, now tell me, uh, tell me my childhood dog Buster was never put down and we're gonna be reunited this weekend. You can paraphrase.
Elliot: Uh, Buster's coming home.
Jake: Cool... See, there's no difference, and Buster meant the world to me.
- Permalink: Elliot, please, look, everybody has their stuff. 'Kay, like me. ...
No one wants to live out their last years in a hospital, but people do. There's really not much we can do for them except try to protect their dignity. And, of course, bet on them.J.D.'s Narration
- Permalink: No one wants to live out their last years in a hospital, but peo...
Elliot: Sex is disgusting!
Carla: I know, sweetie.
- Permalink: Sex is disgusting! I know, sweetie.
Dr. Kelso: That's not yours! That's my car thing! You just painted it!
Janitor: I did not!
Dr. Kelso: You've got green paint on your face!
Janitor: I do n- Well, that's not paint, that's...pudding.
- Permalink: That's not yours! That's my car thing! You just painted it! I ...
I am going to yank that gallbladder out of you so fast that your spleen is gonna say to your kidney, "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO FRANK!?!" That's right, your kidney named your gallbladder Frank.Turk
- Permalink: I am going to yank that gallbladder out of you so fast that your...
All right, everybody! Gather around here, circle it up, will ya? Bring it in nice and tight. Look, I know I'm pretty quick to point out other people's mistakes but...I have a son now, and I also realize that it's important to recognize when someone does something right. Mr. Blake down in Bed 3 came in here with what seemed like a basic heart block. But someone took the time to find out that recently he'd been camping and correctly diagnosed him with Lyme Carditis. Now, I'm sure some of your are gonna think this is a silly exercise, but I'd like that someone to step forward and stick your hand up in the air so that the group can recognize your great good work. This-this is no time to be modest. Come now... Oh! My God! It was me! I did it, I'm a genius, I'm a huge brain in a ripped up body, I am Jesus H. Cox...M.D.Dr. Cox
- Permalink: All right, everybody! Gather around here, circle it up, will ya?...
Elliot: Listen, Jake... Look, it's not that I am never going to have sex with you! I'm going to! And, believe me, when I am on top with my eyes closed and screaming, you're gonna be happy you waited!
Jake: Okay, I'm gonna go ahead and take you off speakerphone.
- Permalink: Listen, Jake... Look, it's not that I am never going to have sex...
Elliot: I don't think that we were going too quick at all. By the way, what do you do?
Jake: I make and distribute Hungarian pornography.
Jake: I'm a real estate developer.
Elliot: Oh, thank God!
- Permalink: I don't think that we were going too quick at all. By the way, w...
J.D.'s Thoughts: Wait, is she in to me? Quick, make a bad joke and see if she laughs.
J.D.: Did you hear the one about the skeleton who couldn't go to the party? He had no body to go with.
Neena: That's really funny!
J.D.'s Narration: Well that's not a fair test - that joke's hilarious.
- Permalink: Wait, is she in to me? Quick, make a bad joke and see if she lau...
Was she always wearing that big hat?Dr. Cox
- Permalink: Was she always wearing that big hat?