Scrubs Season 4 Quotes
Dr. Kelso: That's not yours! That's my car thing! You just painted it!
Janitor: I did not!
Dr. Kelso: You've got green paint on your face!
Janitor: I do n- Well, that's not paint, that's...pudding.
- Permalink: That's not yours! That's my car thing! You just painted it! I ...
Janitor: You paged me in the middle of a busy day! This better be important!
Dr. Kelso: What were you doing?
Janitor: Sleeping in a mop closet.
- Permalink: You paged me in the middle of a busy day! This better be importa...
Carla: Elliot, you can't keep taking J.D. everywhere you go. Sooner or later, you're gonna have to trust yourself.
Elliot: No, I won't, Carla. This system is working. Trust me, heh, I will not be having sex with Jake anytime soon!
Jake: That seems like a...a strange thing to announce to your friends.
- Permalink: Elliot, you can't keep taking J.D. everywhere you go. Sooner or ...
Dr. Kelso: Yeah, I'm sorry, son, I'd love to help you out, but I could give a horse's patootie about your floors.
Janitor: My floors are my children! I'VE GIVEN THEM NAMES!
- Permalink: Yeah, I'm sorry, son, I'd love to help you out, but I could give...
Elliot: Do you guys have any other ideas?
J.D.: You know what, I really don't have time to be dealing with your little sex pickle.
Dr. Kelso: Really? She spent two years dealing with yours.
- Permalink: Do you guys have any other ideas? You know what, I really don'...
Elliot: Look, the reason I've been acting so weird and having my friends hang around us all the time is because I really think that we have a shot for something great, and I don't wanna go and ruin it by sleeping with you too fast. I mean, what was I supposed to do?
Jake: Well, you...you could have just told me that.
Elliot: Yes, but you're forgetting I'm a crazy person!
- Permalink: Look, the reason I've been acting so weird and having my friends...
Janitor: Aaaand finished. I remember the bordello being a little bit bigger and there were probably a few more prostitutes, but maybe I just remember it that way 'cause I was a kid - it was my twelfth birthday. I asked for a bike. I got a 48-year-old whore.
Doug: It's beautiful. It's almost a shame I get these casts off in a week.
Janitor: A month.
Doug: A what?
Janitor: Yeah, I worked too hard on this - you can take 'em off in a month.
Doug: I'll call my orthopedist.
- Permalink: Aaaand finished. I remember the bordello being a little bit bigg...
Elliot: Sex is disgusting!
Carla: I know, sweetie.
- Permalink: Sex is disgusting! I know, sweetie.
Lookit, I know what you're doing in there. You think that if you act like Dr. Sad Sack that the patient's gonna opt out of surgery and I'll have to spend yet another week with a man who has such an unnatural attachment to his gallbladder that, left to his own devices, he would rent a motel room and have sex with it. Now come on, I need you to sling that "I'm gonna get freaky-deeky with my chizzle and-and slizzle up the dizzle for my...bee-aye...yitch" stuff that, you know, you do so well.Dr. Cox
- Permalink: Lookit, I know what you're doing in there. You think that if you...
Dr. Cox: I can't clear his airway. Call 9-1-1! Let's go!
Turk: He'll be brain-dead by the time they get here-
Dr. Cox: Come on!
Turk: I'm gonna do an emergency trach. Lemme get a knife!... A clean knife!
- Permalink: I can't clear his airway. Call 9-1-1! Let's go! He'll be brain...
Hoffner: Why do I have to have my gallbladder taken out?
Dr. Cox: Because, Mr. Hoffner, you have gallstones.
Hoffner: Why do I have gallstones?
Dr. Cox: Did you possibly eat a large gall-boulder and then fall on your stomach?
Hoffner: Do I need my gallbladder?
Dr. Cox: Oh my God, it is a completely useless organ. Oh, wait a minute, that's not completely true. Here, it turns out, we could remove it and then jam it in your mouth to keep you from asking the same question we've been going over for three straight days.
- Permalink: Why do I have to have my gallbladder taken out? Because, Mr. H...
Yeah, now that's just a load of crap. Turns out the only reason anybody ever does anything is to feed the ego. Because that's what we are - ego monsters.Dr. Cox
- Permalink: Yeah, now that's just a load of crap. Turns out the only reason ...