Seinfeld

Seinfeld Season 3 Quotes (Page 11)

Season 3 Episode 9: "The Nose Job"

Kramer: I'm your fianc. Peter Von Nostrand.
 • Rating: Unrated

George: You won't think I'm a bad person?
Jerry: Too late for that.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 8: "The Tape"

George: Great! They have one billion people and he found a relative.
 • Rating: Unrated

George: All right...I've become attracted to Elaine.
 • Rating: Unrated

George: Ask them, are there any side effects.Ping: (joking) Impotence.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jerry: The big toe, the captain!Kramer: What?Jerry: The captain of the toes!
 • Rating: Unrated

Kramer: How often do you cut your toe-nails?
 • Rating: Unrated

George: She had this throaty, sexy kind of whisper.
Elaine: Really , like a... like a... (sexy whisper) Jerry, I want to ssslide my tongue around you like a sssnake... Oh... Oh!
 • Rating: Unrated

George: This is like a Penthouse letter. Why can't I meet women like this?
 • Rating: Unrated

Kramer: Spector gave it to me. He's giving everything away... becoming a minimalist.George: Is that the guy who likes fat women?Jerry: Doesn't the fat fetish conflict with the minimalism?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jerry: Elaine, have you ever gone out with a bald man?
Elaine: No.
Jerry: You know what that makes you, a baldist.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jerry: (to George in a cowboy hat) Sheriff?
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 7: "The Cafe"

Elaine: Why do you keep watching?Jerry: I don't know, I'm obsessed with it. It's like a spider in the toilet struggling for survival. And even though you know he's not gonna make it you, you kinda root for him for a second.Elaine: Then you flush!Jerry: Well, it's a spider.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: I need to get something.George: Monica, I'm really focused here, this stuff's a killer.Monica: George!George: Wish I could.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: Where did you get the coffee?George: Where did I get the coffee? Where do think I got the coffee, from the grocery store.Monica: How did you get there?George: I walked.Monica: How did you get out of the apartment? I didn't see you leave.George: I climbed out the window.Monica: You climbed out the window?George: Of course.Monica: Why didn't you go out the door?George: The door? Why would I go out the door? The window is right here.Monica: You are a fascinating man, George Costanza.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jerry: I am special, my mother was right.
 • Rating: Unrated

Babu: You bad man! You very, very bad man!Jerry: Bad man? Could've my mother been wrong?
 • Rating: Unrated

Kramer: Anyway, it's been two years. I mean, isn't there a statue of limitations on that?Jerry: Statute!Kramer: What?Jerry: Statute of limitations, it's not a statue!Kramer: No, it's statue!Jerry: Fine, it's a sculpture of limitations!Kramer: Elaine. Elaine! Now you're smart. Is it statute or statue of limitations?Elaine: Statute!Kramer: Well, I really think you're wrong!
 • Rating: Unrated

Jerry: (swaying around) It was a maaaad-house...
 • Rating: Unrated

George: People think that I'm smart, but I'm not smart.Jerry: Who thinks that you're smart?
 • Rating: Unrated

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