Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy Central
South-park

Ms. Choksondick: Here's a little picture of Herpes...
(She shows the picture and the girls scream.)
Ms. Choksondick: And here's a little Syphilis for you...
(She shows another picture and the girls scream again.)
Ms. Choksondick: That's right; unless you get your boyfriends to wear condums, you can AND will get these diseases!

I think my boy does need to learn about sexual educationfrom the school.

Sheila

That's what it's called when you milk a dog; Beating it off. God, don't you guys know anything?

Cartman

Stan: Cartman, what the hell are you doing?
Cartman: I'm milking the dog. They make dog milk.

Stan: Don't look at Butters' schlong, gaymo!
Cartman: (in panicking voice) I wasn't looking as his schlong, I was seeing how to put the condom on!
Kyle: Sure.

Oh geez, I don't wanna get the AIDS fellas.

Butters

Yeah, why just this afternoon our son was caught beating off our dog.

Mr. McCormick

(Stan & Kyle torture a Jennifer Lopez doll)
Stan: So, we meet again, Jennifer Lopez!
Kyle: (voicing Jennifer Lopez) No, no, please! This time I swear I won't make albums or movies.
Stan: That's what you said last time, but obviously we must now resort to more drastic measures.
(uses magnifying glass to burn the doll)
Kyle: (voicing Jennifer Lopez) Oh God it burns! It burns!
Stan: Scream for me, bitch!

Penis or vagina! Right, oral sex. Mmkay.

Mr. Mackey
Displaying quotes 1 - 9 of 21 in total