The Office

The Office Season 8 Quotes (Page 4)

Season 8 Episode 15: "Tallahassee"

Packer: Quick query Halpert, still queer?
 • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0

Stanley: Life is short. Drive fast. Leave a sexy corpse. That's one of my mottos.
 • Rating: 4.4 / 5.0

Dwight: It's just stress, 'cause I care about this project. Frankly, the fact that none of you are vomiting or diarrheal right now, I find very alarming.
Erin: Who says none of us are diarrheal?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 14: "Special Project"

Erin: I'm going to Florida...and I'm not coming back.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jim (to Dwight): Do you shower at night? Or do you shower in the morning? 'Cause I wanna shower when you're showering...save some water.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ryan: What were the criteria for going?
Dwight: It might be innate goodness versus innate badness.
 • Rating: Unrated

Kevin: I do deserve a vacation. Sometimes Batman's gotta take off his cape.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight: Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have, and now I no longer own an arctic wolf.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Nate: Oh Darryl. I'm glad to be in your life too. Your card is more beautiful than the gloves.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 8 Episode 13: "Jury Duty"

Dwight: That baby is a Schrute, and unless somebody taught Mose sex, that baby is mine.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Oscar: Don't you wanna see the baby?
Dwight: Why? I know what Angela and the Senator look like. I can mash that up in my head right now.
 • Rating: Unrated

Oscar: I don't know if it's right.
Robert: Well if it's anything like that gorgeous wrapping paper, you hit it out of the park.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dwight: He remembers Toby, the most forgettable man in the known world.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight: You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to beg for mercy. You have the right to request judgment by combat. Dwight's rights.
 • Rating: 3.6 / 5.0

Oscar: Please don't say anything offensive.
Kevin: Got that bimbo?
Erin: Got it bimbo.
 • Rating: Unrated

Stanley: My wife got to the tv first. I had to sit through damn Rizzoli and damn Isles.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Darryl: Would it be more hilarious than Angela having a Chinese baby?
Kevin: A little bit. Yeah. Right guys? Back me up.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Erin: Angela had the baby?
Kevin: Is it black? Because that would be hilarious.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight (to Jim): I can't believe that let someone like you serve on a jury. Makes me question the whole judicial system.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 12: "Pool Party"

Val: Does Daryl not swim?
Kevin: That's racist!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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