The Office

The Office

Thursdays 9:00 PM on NBC

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Season: 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

The Office Season 8 Quotes (Page 6)

Season 8 Episode 9: "Mrs. California"

Dwight: We figured out your goal. I'm gonna make you the buffest dude Val Kilmer has ever seen.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Dwight: What do you want?!?!
Darryl: To look good for Val!
Dwight: Val Kilmer?!? I don't buy it. That doesn't make any sense.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Dwight: How do you think the Fonz got so cool? He stretched his pelvic bowl.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Darryl: I figured I'd start slow.
Dwight: Is that the same philosophy you apply to buffalo wings?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Phyllis: We have a gym at home. It's called the bedroom.
 • Rating: Unrated
Susan: You didn't say goodbye to your grandmother.
Andy: We promised we'd never say goodbye.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Andy: What I wouldn't give for one of Phyllis's classic room clearing farts right now.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 8: "Gettysburg"

Oscar: I apologize for my friend, and for the Republicans who cutting your funding.
 • Rating: 2.3 / 5.0
Ryan: Robert you got your sheep, and you got your black sheep, and I'm not even a sheep. I'm on the freakin' moon.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 7: "Pam's Replacement"

Jim: Stop shoving me.
Dwight: Aww, stop shoving me. Stop grabbing my penis. Grow up.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Dwight: Does your husband have very soft erections?
 • Rating: Unrated
Dwight: Jim has no discernable sense of humor Pam. You should know that.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Andy: When you're in a rock n roll band with somebody, you're bonded for life.
Darryl: Usually their life is short and tragic.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Val: Not bad fellas. You're better than you look.
Kevin: Hey screw you!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Toby: You know what would be the hottest thing ever? A pregnant Helen Mirren.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Pam: And I make sounds much worse than this?
Dwight: Oh we know.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 8 Episode 6: "Doomsday"

Stanley: I know how to save the company, everyone. Just write a petition, get everyone's signature, including our clients, march down to Florida, and shove it up your butt!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Pam: What are you doing?
Dwight: What does it look like I'm doing? Digging a grave for a horse.
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0
Dwight: Can you tell me now where paper comes from?
Kevin: The man tree puts its penis...
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Gabe (to Daryl): The Michilen Man called, he wants his cummerbund back.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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Season: 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Total Season 8 Quotes: 172
Total The Office Quotes: 2585
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