Quick query Halpert, still queer?

Packer

Life is short. Drive fast. Leave a sexy corpse. That's one of my mottos.

Stanley

Dwight: It's just stress, 'cause I care about this project. Frankly, the fact that none of you are vomiting or diarrheal right now, I find very alarming.
Erin: Who says none of us are diarrheal?

I'm going to Florida...and I'm not coming back.

Erin

Do you shower at night? Or do you shower in the morning? 'Cause I wanna shower when you're showering...save some water.

Jim (to Dwight)

Ryan: What were the criteria for going?
Dwight: It might be innate goodness versus innate badness.

I do deserve a vacation. Sometimes Batman's gotta take off his cape.

Kevin

Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have, and now I no longer own an arctic wolf.

Dwight

Oh Darryl. I'm glad to be in your life too. Your card is more beautiful than the gloves.

Nate

That baby is a Schrute, and unless somebody taught Mose sex, that baby is mine.

Dwight

Oscar: Don't you wanna see the baby?
Dwight: Why? I know what Angela and the Senator look like. I can mash that up in my head right now.

Oscar: I don't know if it's right.
Robert: Well if it's anything like that gorgeous wrapping paper, you hit it out of the park.

Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 172 in total

The Office Season 8 Quotes

A fluke is one of the most common fish in the sea, so if you go fishing for a fluke, chances are you just might catch one.

Kevin

Irene: What kind of tea is this?
Erin: Oh, I boiled some Gatorade.

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