Bender: My ass is about to project something
Homer: You don't have to announce it, just do it quietly and blame the dog

Lisa: You know, they look a little similar
Bart: Yeah, like the guy who designed Bender just took a drawing of dad and stuck an antenna on it
Lisa: A little lazy if you ask me

Don't drink my loved ones

Homer

Remember when this country didn't suck? Cuz I don't.

Bart

You always do the right thing...sort of.

Marge

Wait, I finally get what you're saying. Fracking is great, but the only place it should ever happen is in other people's towns.

Homer

I appreciate the counsel Simpson, now please trap door yourself out.

Mr. Burns

I demand to see that capitalism castrating suffragette this instant.

Mr. Burns

It's true, it would be a cold day in Hell when I was popular.

Lisa

The power of Chrysler compels you!

Homer

The bed is lifting me, the elevator at work can't even do that.

Homer

I was sleeping in the dryer and got caught in your sheets.

Grandpa

The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

You know, you remind me of a poem I can't remember, and a song that may never have existed, and a place I'm not sure I've ever been to.

Grampa