The Simpsons

The Simpsons Quotes (Page 4)

Episode 4: "Replaceable You"

Homer: If an emergency alarm goes off, there's ear plugs in the top drawer.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Marge, get my seal club, the big one.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: To sweeten the deal, I'll pick you first for basketball.
Martin: To be a mathlete without the 'm.'
 • Rating: Unrated

Milhouse: I need that [cootie] shot, my dog and I accidentally touched tongues.
Bart: How is this accidentally when it's the fifth time?
 • Rating: Unrated

Episode 3: "Treehouse of Horror XXII"

Ned: Spend less time on your back and more time on your knees.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Traitor. How dare you betray me on me on the planet that got me laid?
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: For further communication I will require more beans.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Halloween - the one time of the year where the squalor of our home works to our advantage.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: I'm the floor. I can't move. So far a normal Sunday morning...
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: I take your sugary sweets and give you healthy items...
Bart: This is exactly why kids need a union.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lisa: Now prepare to take an incredible journey across the room.
 • Rating: Unrated

Episode 2: "Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts"

Neslon: This place is beautiful as a the side of a Coors Lite bottle. The kind my dad used to leave in te bathroom.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: I thought teachers only went outside to smoke and cry.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Same garbage, different dumpster.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Edna: We have shirts from other high schools.
Marge: Ooh, we can wear those to the nice malls.
 • Rating: Unrated

Sea Captain: Yar, just plastic. Which is healthier than what you find in the ocean.
 • Rating: Unrated

Episode 1: "The Falcon and the D'Ohman"

Marge: I do have a place you can go, where a man with sadistic man with government experience can feel right at home.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: So much violence on the surface world, I'm going back.
 • Rating: Unrated

Wayne: Homer is implanted with several high powerful traffic devices.
Marge: How did that happen?
Wayne: I left them in a bowl and he ate them.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: No! Not the middle seat!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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