The Simpsons Season 1 Quotes
I'm gonna miss you, son. And listen, while you're seeing all those great sights, always remember that you're representing your country. I guess what I'm saying is, don't mess up France the way you messed up your room.Homer
- Permalink: I'm gonna miss you, son. And listen, while you're seeing all tho...
(The Simpson family waits for Adil's arrival at the airport.)
Lisa: You know, in Albania, the unit of currency is called the lek.
Homer: (Chuckles). You gotta be kiddin'. (Chuckles) The lek.
Lisa: And the national flag is a two-headed eagle on a red field.
Homer: Give me the ol' stars and stripes.
Lisa: And the main export is furious political thought.
Homer: Political what?
- Permalink: (The Simpson family waits for Adil's arrival at the airport.) ...
You may find his accent peculiar. Certain aspects of his culture may seem absurd, perhaps even offensive. But I urge you all to give little Adil the benefit of the doubt. In this way, and only this way, can we hope to better understand our backward neighbors throughout the world.Principal Skinner
- Permalink: (Principal Skinner introduces the new exchange student, Adil, to...
(Bart tries to seek help from a French policeman after he is sent into town by Cesar and Ugolin, and he walks away dejected, because he couldn't communicate in French with the policeman.)
Bart: I'm so stupid. Anybody could have learned this dumb language by now. Here I've listened to nothing but French for the past (Speaking French) two months and I haven't learned a word. Wait! I'm talking French now. Incredible!
(Bart runs back up to the French policeman.)
Bart: (Speaking French) You gotta help me! These two guys work me night and day. They don't feed me. They make me sleep on the floor. They put anti-freeze in the wine, and they gave my red hat to the donkey.
Policeman: (Speaking French) Anti-freeze in the wine? That is a very serious crime!
- Permalink: (Bart tries to seek help from a French policeman after he is sen...
Marge: Homer, I'd love a glass of that wine Bart brought us.
(Homer struggles with the wine bottle.)
Homer: Sorry, Marge. Some wise guy stuck a cork in the bottle.
Bart: (Speaking French) My father. What a buffoon.
Homer: You hear that, Marge? My boy speaks French!
- Permalink: Homer, I'd love a glass of that wine Bart brought us. (Homer st...
(Bart holds a cherry bomb in his hand.)
Milhouse: So, you're gonna flush it?
Bart: What can I say? I got a weakness for the classics
- Permalink: (Bart holds a cherry bomb in his hand.) So, you're gonna flush...
(Principal Skinner pays a visit to the Simpson home.)
Marge: Homer, Principal Skinner is here.
Homer: Oh, hello, Principal Skinner. I'd get up, but the boy crippled me.
Skinner: Mm-hmm. I understand completely.
- Permalink: (Principal Skinner pays a visit to the Simpson home.) Homer, P...
(Principal Skinner tries to convince Marge and Homer to place Bart in the student exchange program.)
Principal Skinner: Actually, he'd be staying in France, in a lovely chateau in the heart of the wine country.
Marge: But Bart doesn't speak French.
Principal Skinner: Oh, when he's fully immersed in a foreign language, the average child can become fluent in weeks!
Homer: Yeah, but what about Bart?
Principal Skinner: I'm sure he'll pick up enough to get by.
- Permalink: (Principal Skinner tries to convince Marge and Homer to place Ba...
(Bart likes the idea of becoming an exchange student in France.)
Bart: And I'd get to take a plane there, wouldn't I, Mom?
Marge: Yes, Bart.
Bart: Wow! And one back?
- Permalink: (Bart likes the idea of becoming an exchange student in France.)...
Cesar: Drink this.
Bart: Oh, no thanks.
Cesar: Do not worry. This is France. (Chuckles) It is customary for children to take a little wine now and then.
Bart: Yeah, but it's got anti-freeze in there.
Cesar: Drink it!
- Permalink: Drink this. Oh, no thanks. Do not worry. This is France. (Ch...
Adil: How can you defend a country where 5 percent of the people control 95 percent of the wealth?
Lisa: I'm defending a country where people can think, and act, and worship any way they want!
Adil: Can not.
Lisa: Can too.
Adil: Can not!
Lisa: Can too!
Homer: Please, please kids! Stop fighting. Maybe Lisa's right about America being the land of opportunity, and maybe Adil has a point about the machinery of capitalism being oiled with the blood of the workers.
- Permalink: How can you defend a country where 5 percent of the people contr...
(Adil clears the dishes after dinner.)
Homer: Did you see that? You know, Marge, this the way I've always wanted it to be. We've become a fully functioning family unit. We've always blamed ourselves, but I guess it's pretty clear which cylinder wasn't firing.
Lisa: Your paper-thin commitment to your children sends shivers down my spine! May I be excused?
(Lisa gets up and leaves.)
Homer: Oh, she's just jealous. She'll get over it. And if she doesn't, we can always exchange her. (Laughs)
Homer: Just kidding!
- Permalink: (Adil clears the dishes after dinner.) Did you see that? You k...
Ah, the fourth grade will now favor us with a melody...err...medley of holiday flavorites.Principal Skinner
- Permalink: Ah, the fourth grade will now favor us with a melody...err...med...
Principal Skinner: The fifth grade will now favor us with a scene from Charles Dickens' Christmas Carol.
Homer: How many grades does this school have!?
- Permalink: The fifth grade will now favor us with a scene from Charles Dick...