The Simpsons

The Simpsons Season 22 Quotes (Page 6)

Season 22 Episode 11: "Flaming Moe"

Superintendent Chalmers: Skinner, you're a regular Casanova, or, in English, regular house.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

Bart: I see how it is. You get a booty calla and I get a cootie call.
 • Rating: Unrated

Superintendent: I'm dating one of your mothers. I forget which one.
 • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0

Moe: I'd have to move in with mom, who's dead and doesn't have a house.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Smithers: Can I have a scotch and water?
Moe: My scotch is a scotch and water.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Smithers: They're fighting like Iran and Iraq!
Mr. Burns: What?
Smithers: Persia and Mesopotamia.
 • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0

Lenny: They think they're better than us because their performance review reflects it!
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 22 Episode 10: "Moms I'd Like To Forget"

Homer: Oh, you beautiful man!
Flanders: That feeling is mutual of Omaha.
Homer: God, you're hilarious!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dr. Hibbert [about Comic Book Guy]: Tell him it's the "worst prognosis ever!" Hee hee hee.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Comic Book Guy: Your scar, like Tom Cruise's last good movie, was Born on the Fourth of July.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: This is late for Marge. I assume. I've never been home at this hour.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Go out on a Tuesday? Who am I, Charlie Sheen?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Moe: That wasn't the Wi-Fi - that was my Bell's Palsy acting up.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Bart: I'll buy the white wine.
Marge: You can't buy white wine!
Bart: Why not? Are you having red meat?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Marge: Why do you have to eat have to eat peanuts in the shower?
Homer: It gives me the fresh circus feeling in the morning.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Willie: Ah only took this refereein' gig 'cause ah was cold and they gave me this shirt.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Season 22 Episode 9: "Donnie Fatso"

Homer: And the only one who ever shot anyone is the baby.
 • Rating: Unrated

Fat Tony: In the strip club of my heart, you held da key to da champagne room. I loved you, man.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: I hope Heaven's outer room is painted that eggshell blue you could never achieve on Earth.
 • Rating: Unrated

FBI Agent: You will be known as Nicky "Bluepants" Altosaxophoni.
Homer: Can I keep the name after I'm done?
Agent: No. It belongs to the government.
 • Rating: Unrated

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