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The-simpsons

That's great honey, if you were a boy you'd be a scientist.

Homer

Grampa: The television only has one channel.
Aide: That's a fish tank!
Grampa: You're a fish tank.
Aide: That was hurtful. I wish I was a fish tank, then I could filter out his nasty words.

Nelson: Did you find any gold?
Bart: Even better, the prospectors left naughty French postcards.
Nelson: Bart, this is fool's porn, I'll take it off your hands.

Chalmers: I recall you took a sick day of which you had none.
Skinner: I was gonna lose my foot...
Chalmers: Of which you have two.

Hey this is one of the planets in Star Wars.

Otto [upon arriving at desert]

According to this live blog, Ben Stiller and Jack Black are doing a bit that will not end.

Marge

I was born a rolling 80's, I'll die a rolling 80's.

Homer

Red Carpet Interviewer: And Lisa, who are you wearing?
Lisa: I believe it's from Lamps Plus.

And I'd like to thank the women who's been inspiring me for the last 25 years... the cute one from The Bangles.

Homer
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