Here's your taco mister. Oops, I dropped it in the fryer. I'll get it out. Ow. Oooow! Ooow! Oow!

Squeeky-Voiced Teen

Give me a bigger lolly!

Krusty

Bette Midler: Great show Krusty! You deserve an Emmy for this!
Krusty: Forget it. The academy hates me...I don't know why...they wouldn't know comedy if it bit them on their (notices the camera) Hey! Hey!

Krusty: I've had plenty of guys come after me and I've buried them all. Hobos, sea captains, Joey Bishop
Krusty's Assistant: Don't forget the Special Olympics.
Krusty: Oh, yeah. I buried the Special Olympics!

Don't snap my undies.

Chief Wiggum

Bette Midler: Did you ever know that you're my hero? You're everything I would like to be.
Krusty: You can fly higher than an eagle.
Bette/Krusty: Cause you/I are/am the wind beneath my/your wings.

Bart: Moe, look over there! (as a distraction)
Moe: What? What am I looking at? I don't see nothing. I'm gonna stop looking soon What? What, is that it?
Homer walks into Moe's Tavern
Homer: Hey Moe, can I look, too?
Moe: Sure, but it'll cost ya.
Homer: My wallet's in the car.
Homer runs out
Moe: He is so stupid. And now back to the wall.

I'll admit I used the city treasury to fund the murder of my enemies, but as Gabbo would say, I'm a bad wittle boy.

Mayor Quimby

Krusty: Bette and I owned a race horse together: Krudler.

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Krusty: Ugh, 35 years in show business and already no one remembers me, just like what's-his-name and whose-it, and you know that guy, always wore a shirt?
Bart: Ed Sullivan?

Gabbo: (prank calls Krusty the Clown)
Krusty: If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!

Rainier: My son returns from a fancy east coast college and I'm horrified to find he's a nerd.
Kent: Haha, I'm laughing already.
Rainier: It's not a comedy.

The Simpsons Season 4 Quotes

Homer: Marge, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich for a moment.
Marge: Are you going to eat it?
Homer: (short silence) ...Yes.

Marge: Homer, there's a family of possums in here.
Homer: I call the big one "bitey."