The Simpsons

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The only danger is if they send us to that terrible Planet of the Apes. Wait a minute... Statue of Liberty... that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to Hell!

Homer

Bart: Wow. My dad an astronaut. I feel so full of ... what's the opposite of shame?
Marge: Pride?
Bart: No, not that far from shame.
Homer: Less shame?
Bart: Yeah.

(on the phone) Hello, is this NASA? Good! I'm sick of your boring space launches! And another thing! How come I can't get no Tang around here?

Homer

Well, this reporter was ... possibly a little hasty earlier and would like to reaffirm his allegiance to this country and its human president. It may not be perfect, but it's the best government we have. For now.

Kent Brockman

Lisa: Come on, Dad. You can make it!
Grampa: Oh, of course he'll make it, it's TV.

Buzz Aldrin: So Barney, we hear you're kickin' ass.
Homer: I, uh, don't think this contest is over yet Buzz. If that is your real name. I believe there is still a little something called the swimsuit competition.
Buzz Aldrin: There's no swimsuit competition, Homer.
Homer: You mean I shaved my bikini zone for nothing?

(The family watches Homer's launch on TV.)
Bart: Go, Dad, go!
Lisa: How doth the hero, strong and brave, a celestial path to the heavens paved!
(The family stares at her.)
Lisa: Go, Dad, go.

Default? Woohoo! The two sweetest words in the English language!

Homer

NASA Scientist: Sir, we've run into a serious problem with the mission. These Nielsen ratings are the lowest ever.
NASA Executive: Oh, my God! We've been beaten by "A Connie Chung Christmas."

(singing) Sweet dreams and flying machines, in pieces on the ground. Oops. Uh, sweet dreams and flying machines, flying safely through the air.

James Taylor

Scientist: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet the two experienced astronauts who will accompany the winner into space, Race Banyon and Buzz Aldrin, the second man on the moon.
Buzz: Second comes right after first!

Looking at that tired old freak has made me realize I'm no spring chicken myself. I can feel death's clammy hand on my shoulder. Wait, that's my hand.

Grampa
Displaying quotes 181 - 192 of 624 in total

The Simpsons Season 5 Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Kent Brockman: When cat burglaries start, can mass murders be far behind? This reporter isn't saying that the burglar is an inhuman monster like the Wolfman, but he very well could be. So, professor: would you say it's time for everyone to panic?
Professor: Yes I would, Kent.

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