Nancy: Why do you do that whole sexist thing? That whole oppression thing?
Club owner: Because you scare the sh*t out of us.

Doug: I'm on fuego. You want to dance?
Nancy: No I'm okay.
Doug: Andy?

Shane: We'll let the lab decide.
Silas: Lab?
Shane: DNA my brother or should I say half brother.

(to Silas) He's so your f*cking dad.

Shane

Guy that they hit: Give me a hundred bucks and we'll call it a day.
Andy: That seems to be the popular number these days.

Hey man, sorry we dented your house.

Doug

84720. I was an accountant. Numbers were my thing.

Doug

(to her dead parents graves) You think marrying a Jew was bad, you should have met this little guy's father.

Nancy

Silas: So what do you think is in the locked room at the end of the hall?
Shane: Probably a shrine to our mom.

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