Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXFavorite Brian Griffin Quotes
You go ahead, I have to make the waffle fries you scream-requested in the car.
Peter: I missed you Brian.
Brian: I missed you too Peter.
Peter: And now Im gonna go upstairs and pee in Meg's bed.
Brian: No, we're going to go pee in Meg's bed.
Peter: Good boy.
Peter: Boy, I got myself into a real situation, didn't I? But don't worry, I've got a plan to get us out of this!
Brian: Oh, good, I was afraid you were just going to improvise.
Peter: Oh, well actually I was gonna use the little girl as a human shield and run like hell! But uh, yeah, improvise. That'll be easier on my back
Stewie: Yes looks like someone's gone at him with a whip.
Brian: That is a perfectly valid way of saying that. Bravo master.
Stewie: Master? Aaand a surprisingly quick erection for Stewie.
God he must be the coolest fat guy in a train conductor's cap in the world!
Peter: I know you cant understand what I'm going through, Lois. I mean all the stuff that makes you happy, you know, like cooking and cleaning - it's alright here in the house just waiting for you. You are one lucky...
Brian: Uh, uh stop. Now
Brian: You've been hanging out with Tom Cruise?
Stewie: Sure have. We spent the whole day together, and he showed me there are a lot of advantages to being short.
Brian: Yeah? Like what? You're the last one to get wet when it rains?
So I was wondering why this tampon commerical was so long, until I realized it was a rerun of Sex and The City
Brian: OMG, Stewie. What are you doing in the toilet with the lid closed?
Stewie: Ted R. says this is where a piece of crap has to live.
You're like all the worst parts of a girlfriend.
I don't think it's lost on any of us that the laws are writte on white paper.
I'm just saying. It's no surprise that justice isn't colorblind.
