The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 21 Quotes
Grandpa: Why don't we let Homer tell the story.
Homer: Really, me? You mean it?
Grandpa: I think you're ready for your first ramble.
Homer: I've been waiting for this day for so long. The year is 1946, and in a world torn, a single flower blooms and that flower is an angry Japanese monster named Godzilla. How am I doing dad?
Grandpa: I'm hanging on every word.
Clouds are God's sneezes.
Ralph
Give Larry my number. I can teach him things. Useful things.
Agnes
Grandpa: Look at that, they re-created the thirties: tent cities, failing banks.
Marshall: Nope, those are real.
Lisa: Chief, my brother fell in the storm drain!
Chief Wiggum: I'm strictly an above the ground policeman, what you need is the sewer cops.
Lisa: Fine, what's the number?
Chief Wiggum: Lisa, you're old enough now that I can tell you the truth. There's no such thing as sewer cops. It's just something we tell the kids to feel safe.
Lisa: What about Bart?
Chief Wiggum: Well if you miss him, you can yell into a toilet.
Grandpa: That's how I got my idea for a suitcase with wheels: from a commercial for a suitcase with wheels.
You're in the newspaper business? Something that's going to die before I do.
Grandpa
Lisa: Slimu looks kind of uncomfortable.
Homer: Wouldn't you if you were a salt water fish in a fresh water aquarium?
Oh, I love going to aquatic parks. Sure they have less rides than amusement parks, less fish than the aquariums, but the parking is ample.
Homer
Simpson, step away from the orphan, do not give him any more love. I repeat, do not give him any more love.
Chief Wiggum
Apu: Lisa, how do you like sharing a bathroom with two brothers?
Lisa: Two brothers? Bart, who is this kid?
Bart: He's an orphan, he's like Annie except he's a dude and he hates tomorrow.
Charlie: I hate it so much.
Bart: How did you escape the island of misfit boys?
Charlie: Shimmied down a drain pipe.
Bart: You like to shimmy? I like to shimmy. Where do you see yourself in twenty years?
Charlie: One-armed drummer in a prison rock band.
Bart: Nice. Favorite Beatle?
Charlie: Dung.
