Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCFavorite Claire Dunphy Quotes
Claire: It's shaving time, shavy gravy, Shaved by the Bell!
Alex: Why are you talking like dad?
I know you think you discovered the new you, but you're controlling even when you're trying to not be controlling.
Mitchell [to Claire]
Claire: My mom started drinking these cocktails called "horny Colombians" with some of Gloria's uncles, whom apparently the drink was named after
Phil: Oh come, they were funny
Claire: They kept grabbing my butt
Phil: Somebody is full of herself. It's a Colombian wedding tradition.. they said
Phil: I think what your mother is worried about is you getting your heart broken when Dylan goes off to college next year
Claire [same time]: That's not what I'm worried about...
Haley [same time]: Dylan's not going to college
Claire: He's not going to college?
Haley: He's in a band, they're going on tour
Claire: Oh this keeps getting better and better
Dede: Why so long?
Claire: I know it's weird when it's been a long time since we talked
Dede: I meant your hair
I'm fairly confident that Dad's proudest moment was when you finally took off the flame-red unitard
Phil loves Spandau Ballet. That song "True" was playing in the car the first time we kissed. It's our song.
Claire: We're gonna pass into legend. The parents who canceled Christmas.
Phil: I thought you'd be happy.
Claire: They'll write songs about us. They'll make a Christmas special with those ugly little clay pieces.
Claire: They're getting more in next week.
Phil: Next week? That's like the worst thing you can say to an early adopter.
No, I don't love the dog. I love my couch and the dog was looking at it like it was a giant sausage.
Phil: We're like two peas in a pod, or Siamese twins, a snake with two heads!
Claire: They've actually been all those things for Halloween.
Claire: Did you make the ladyfingers? Did you go to the gym?
Phil: Boy, you're really starting to sound like your old self.
