South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralEric Cartman Quotes
Cartman: Oh my God they killed Kenny!
Kyle: (while outside, not seeing this) You bastards!
Killer-weak-sweet.
(Cartman is sitting on Kenny)
Cartman: Cartman Von Cartman has ways of making you talk! (Farts)
Kenny: Aaah!
Cartman: But Mr. Garrison, I have to go and sing the Cheesy Poofs song!
Mr. Garrison: No Eric, you have to come in the Planetarium and look at a bunch of stupid stars.
Man Singing: I love Cheesy Poofs. You love Cheesy Poofs. If we didn't love Cheesy Poofs, we'd all be...
Cartman: (flatly)...Lame.
Mrs. Cartman: Hon, don't pick your nose.
Cartman: God dammit, I'm not picking it. I have an itch for crying out loud.
Cartman: Hey, they're giving out bread outside!
Poor girl: Finally we can get something to eat.
(when the poor girl and her mom walk outside, Cartman shuts the door)
Cartman: Psych!!
Why hello. If it isn't my little friends with all their little dreams.
Cartman: I could sing the cheesy poof song with both hands tied behind my back!
Kyle: You couldn't get both hands behind your back, fatty!
Cartman: (while at Kenny's house) Where is the Nintendo?
Mr. McCormick: We don't have a Nintendo. We got a Coleco Vision plugged into the black and white TV.
Kyle: Oh my God, this is like a third-world country.
Kyle: Here's Kenny's house.
Cartman: (singing) In the ghetto. On a cold and grey Chicago morn, another little baby child is born in the ghetto. (In the ghetto!)
I'm going to kick her square in the nuts!
