Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy Central

It was like having the life sucked out of you. That's all it is, sliding down a cable.

Kyle: Just be careful you don't end up naked and jackin' it in San Diego.
Stan: What the hell does that mean?

You're gonna stop bullying. With Cartman singing about his vagina.

How can we be passé, we're only in 4th grade.

Dude an award show just for comedy sounds like a bad idea.

Stan: What's a muff cabbage?
Kyle: It's a Jersey thing.

Cartman: You know what you want to do if you want a family to move away? Every night you take a crap on their doorstep.
Kyle: Is that why there's crap on my doorstep every morning?
Cartman: Oops. Busted.

Ms. Choksondik: Alright, children, in lieu of the common usage, I'm supposed to clarify the school's position on the word, "shit."
Stan: Wow! We can say "shit" in school now?
Kyle: This is ridiculous! Just because they say it on TV it's alright.

Chef: I'm very proud of you, children. Let's all go home and find a nice white woman to make love to.
Stan: Yeah, and Kenny didn't die!
Kenny: (muffled) Yeah, and I didn't die- (pukes out his intestines and dies)
Stan: Holy sh- I mean, poop.
Kyle: Yeah. Poop.
Cartman: I love you guys...

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