Carl: Hey can you fix the sound?
Lenny: And the color?
Moe: And show it in a regular theatre?

Carl: What's wrong Moe?
Moe: I just got this strange feeling Homer's in trouble.
Lenny: That's weird I just got this strange feeling some guy I don't know named Fausto is in trouble.
Moe: Come on we got to save Homer!
Lenny: And Fausto!

Wow, even I ain't hopin' for porn.

</i> Moe

Patty: Elvis Stojko is so handsome!
Selma: He can grease up my skates anytime!
Moe: Don't you hags know that all male figure skaters are twinkly in the lutz?
Elvis Stojko: That's a common misconception. I have a girlfriend in Vancouver.
Moe: Made up girlfriend, made up city!

(to Lisa) My brain goo's coming out all artistical, thanks to you.

(singing) Happy Birthday to me, happy birthday to me. I feel so damn lonely, won't someone kill me?! cries in hands And many more!

</i> Moe

That's a terrific title. It jumps out at you like a rat out of your underwear drawer.

Homer: This vibrating massage chair feels great.
Moe: That ain't a massage chair, it's just full of cockroaches.

Marge (reading Moe's note): "Dear pus bag . . ."
Homer: Whoa, Marge, who'd you piss off?
Moe: It's for you, pus bag!

Moe: Look at me, sitting here depressed when I'm surrounded by the happiest people in the world : writers.

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Lisa: You're a heartless jerk!
Moe: Where did that come from? Oh, right, my actions.

Moe: Heh, heh. This is the first time I ever watered down my liquor!
Lenny: Moe, why are your eyes darting back and forth like that?

The Simpsons Quotes

Officer Eddie: (reading Steve Sax's license) Well well, Steve Sax, from New York City.
Officer Lou: I heard some guy got killed in New York City and they never solved the case. But you wouldn't know anything about that now, would you, Steve?
(Lou and Eddie laugh)
Steve Sax: But there are hundreds of unsolved murders in New York City.
Officer Lou: You don't know when to keep your mouth shut, do you, Saxxy Boy?

Wow, now I see why they call you Miss Hoover. You must have been vacuuming for an hour.

Bart