Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXFavorite Peter Griffin Quotes
What do people do who don't drink?
I can get people to pay me 10 bucks just for doing stupid stuff?
Getting alcohol when you're underage isn't as easy as Obama's daughters make it look.
Sitting here all sober is more boring than watching a pot boil.
Yeah. Now I'm gonna stick my raw pasta in ya.
I'm not the smartest man in the world, but I can always look back on my life and say I went for it.
We want that drinkin' law gone, and everybody knows the best way to get any law struck down is to get the gays angry about it.
Don't you understand what drinking means to us workin' stiffs? It helps us forget about our day and tell our children we love them with a straight face.
Brian: Amazing, you can barely drive a car, and yet you are allowed to fly a blimp?
Peter: Yeah, America's great, except for the south
Peter: Is that the one where they make his dress in little shorts and hats like the guy from AC/DC?
Brian: Yeah. Why does he wear that outfit?
Peter: 'Cuz he rocks!
Peter: Gretchen? Wow. You look great.
Gretchen: Yeah. I didn't have kids, so.
Quagmire: Hey Peter, you want to play "drink the beer"?
Peter: Sure. (takes drink of beer)
Quagmire: You win!
Peter: What do I win?
Quagmire: Another beer!
Peter: Oh man, I'm going for the high score!
Quagmire: Actually, Charlie has the high score.
Charlie [peeing in grandfather clock]: Hey man, your clock won't flush
