Stewie Griffin Quotes
Ok, ok. I've got it, I've got it. If you cooked any more slowly, you wouldn't need an egg timer. You'd need an egg calendar. Ah ha ha ha. Oh, that's right. I went there
Hey, mother, I come bearing a gift. I'll give you a hint. It's in my diaper and it's not a toaster
I say, if you cooked any slower... well, you wouldn't be cooking very fast at all, would you?...Well, that wasn't very good
You know, mother, as first lady of the American stage Helen Hayes once said, "I'm going to kill you"
Hello, I'm Stewie. Big fan
Peter: Look. Here they are. My family. Guys, I don't say this often enough, but I'm gonna die!
Lois: Oh my god.
Stewie: High five! Anyone? Anyone?
What's that? Oh yeah. I love crack, I'm absolutly coo-coo for crack
God! Do you people speak every language except english? Yo quiero pancakes! Done ma pancakes! Click click bloody click pancakes!
Stewie: What the hell is this?
Lois: Sweetie, that's tuna salad.
Stewie: Oh, is that what it is? Really? Because I could have sworn it was mayonnaise and cat food
You're urinating! So, it's been you all along. Oh, this is too perfect! I've been taking the blame for Rex!
Oh dear me, yes yes, this is how I wanted to enter the new millennium...locked in the basement with imbeciles dressed like a gay Neil Armstrong
Meg: There's no factory?
Stewie: Ha! Very good, fat man! We follow the Pied Piper of Hamsteak to the Gates of Oblivion, and look what it's brought us! We're finished! We're done! Game over, man! Game over!