The Janitor Quotes
Molly: This is a really windy hospital.
Janitor: Oh, I'm sorry. I was, er, drying up a patient's urine.
J.D.: Woohoo! Ring around the Janitor! Pocket full of-
Janitor: You're funny. Pocket full of what?
J.D.: ...Zanitor.
Janitor: Not a word!
J.D.: Why the giant X?
Janitor: Why the stupid face?
J.D.: Touch.
Janitor: You know, I know you knocked that exit sign down.
J.D.: Well then I'm sure I can expect an appropriate retaliatory response. Maybe you could shoot me in the neck.
Janitor: You like huntin' squirrels?
J.D.: I'd never tried it.
Janitor: Easiest thing in the world - all you need are some walnuts...and a boxing glove!
I'm-I'm kind of a favorite around here!
J.D.: Don't look at me, it just fell.
J.D.'s Narration: Please please please please please please please please please please please please please!
Janitor: Proceed unmolested.
Janitor: Sounds like fun, but no. Our game is over, buddy. Your residency's coming to a close and... that's it, nothing left to do but...
J.D.: What can I say, it's been... horrifying.
Janitor: Thank you!
Janitor: Bull's eye!
J.D.: We're not done with our thing yet, are we.
Janitor: No. For you, it's all just beginning.
J.D.'s Narration: The weird thing is, he was right.
Carla: So, how are you holding up?
Janitor: Cleaning's an art. My mop is my paintbrush.
Dr. Maddox: Do you think it would have been funny if you'd broken his neck?
Janitor: I feel like I ought to say no.
Dr. Maddox: What's your name?
Janitor: Oh boy. You really are new here. (She looks at his security pass.) Uh oh.
Dr. Maddox: "The Janitor".
Janitor: Howdy.
(Janitor sticks out mop handle and trips J.D.)
Janitor: Stop confusing me by being nice and giving me phones.
J.D.: Fine! But why'd you have to trip me?
Janitor: Let me answer that question with another question: 'cause I wanted to.
