Tom Haverford Quotes (Page 8)
Season 2, Episode 20: "94 Meetings"
Leslie: OK, so I have everything I need, right? I have a fresh cup of coffee, comfy fur-lined boots.
Tom: I'm going to need those boots back by the end of the day.
Leslie: Yeah, no problem. They're actually a little narrow for me.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 2, Episode 20: "Summer Catalog"
Tom: We need to do something to distract from this... boring area. Now I didn't want to have to do this but we may have to go nude.
Ann: Goodbye, Tom.
• Rating: Unrated
Tom: In a million years, I never thought you'd be the problem with this photo shoot.
Ann: Didn't you just plan this like two hours ago?
• Rating: Unrated
Tom: Hey, if there's anyone out there that's doing a photo shoot about the dangers of eating undercooked chicken, I can give you Ann's phone number.
• Rating: Unrated
Tom: Come on, Ann, what are we doing? Maxim or Good Housekeeping?
Ann: I'm not sure which one is the insult.
• Rating: Unrated
Tom: An animal on the head, a manimal in the bed.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 19: "Park Safety"
Tom: Hey, Jerry? April was just double checking the lunch order. Do you want the salmon or the twout?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Tom: This thing is a mess.
Carl: We used to have three cars actually. The first one got pushed into the creek by some kids. The second one raccoons got onto. There was urine everywhere. And the third one was recently stolen.
Tom: What's this one?
Carl: This is the second one. The raccoon piss one.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Carl: Oh you think you know how to do my job? You might not be so confident once you've walked a mile in my size 7s.
Leslie: Kinda small feet.
Tom: Actually 7 is the worldwide average.
Carl: Boom!
• Rating: Unrated
Tom: You went on a vacation and you chose Muncie, Indiana?
Jerry: My wife and I have a timeshare.
Tom: In Muncie?!
Leslie: Tom, Muncie is a lovely city.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 160
