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Veronica: Children, they have so many uses. They're like adorable Swiss Army knives.
Ted: Although they can't open wine worth a damn.


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Ted Crisp Quotes, Veronica Palmer Quotes, Better Off Ted Season 2 Episode 5 Quotes, Better Off Ted Quotes
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Better Off Ted Season 2 Episode 5 Quotes

Veronica [to Rose]: Muss up his hair, it's the source of all his power.
Ted: Oh, no! Not the hair!
Veronica: Now smash him with the phone. (they stare) Why will no one in this building ever smash anyone with a phone?

Erica: Gosh, Ted, it's like you were poured into that suit.
Ted: And part of me is still hardening.