Without Germans, you wouldn't have any of the Indiana Jones movies.


You in orange? You'll look like a creamsicle with an old tooth stuck in it.


Hazel: He's only allergic to allergy medication.
Kenneth: But he loves it!

Unfortunately, unless Harry's Law really took off this week and no one told me, you two are the biggest stars at the network.


Jack: Whatever are you doing here, Kaylie Hooper?
Kaylie: Enjoying my total lack of adult supervision. I just had fruit roll ups for dinner...at a strip club.

A Parcell man has never been called mister outside of an execution chamber.


Kenneth: I'm Kenneth by the way.
Liz: Me too. I'm Kenneth...Kenneth, uh, Toilet Hole.

So we're thinking the show's more like The Girls Next Door, and you're that old boat captain that shows up sometimes.


Kaylie: My mom is in Indonesia visiting her charity where poor children make shoes.
Jack: Isn't that just a sweatshop?

I feel like Oscar the Grouch today, and not just because I woke up in a garbage can this morning startling someone named Gordon.


Last time I was this excited...was this morning. I saw a cat wearing the same sweater as its person.


Wow, that is some high level paranoid thinking...like Hitler, or Willy Wonka.


30 Rock Season 6 Quotes

I really like my guy. He's sort of a Doogie Howser type, but younger.


His screams were the worst thing I ever heard...until tonight. Congratulations, you're a disgrace.