I started eating the lettuce under my onion rings.


Let's set aside how idiotic that plan was, and imagine a world where it actually worked!

Jack Donaghy

He reversed the parody. He normal Al'd us.


Liz: Your insistence that the Jack character have an awesome catch phrase...
Jack: An idea that's off the charts, Kimosabe.

Diana: Oh, you're still here.
Liz: That's what they all say.

It's crass Jack, like personalized wedding vows or standing up in a pool.


My father wore this to his high school prom. The theme was Enchantment Under the Jim Crow Laws.


You think I'm stupid...just because my college got tipped over by those Miami Heat fans?


Liz: The male gaze.
Hazel: Yeah, they're all a bunch of gays.

Do not write another sketch with Krang from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. No one knows who Krang is. It would be a waste of time to talk about Krang on television.


Hazel: What's your problem?
Kenneth: Oh my well, my parents were technically brothers...

Hazel: Kenneth, can I speak with you?
Kenneth: Can you? You just did.

30 Rock Season 6 Quotes

I really like my guy. He's sort of a Doogie Howser type, but younger.


His screams were the worst thing I ever heard...until tonight. Congratulations, you're a disgrace.