Family Guy

Sundays 9:00 PM on FOX
Family guy
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Like Moses and his buddy who liked to collect seashells.


Peter's Wife's Cookies.


If you say it like that one more time, I'm going to drown you.


Could you get me some yaww-gurt?


Vegetable, meat, meat, vegetable, meat.


How far away are the stars?



Cookie Monster

North Dakota, we're not even the best Dakota!


I've seen the guy get punched in the face thousands of times, and now he's making science stuff.


I'm the guy who killed your bodyguard.


I sucked him dry, he gave a blood donation as well!


Relax, Im sure Wycelf Jean got it all under control.

Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 1961 in total

Family Guy Quotes

Stewie: (Comes into the bedroom) Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois: What!?
Stewie: Hi! (Giggling and running out of the room)

Hi, I'm Wilford Brimley and I have diabetes. It hurts me to pee and it causes me to be short with my family. I can't sleep at night. The other day I stubbed my toe and took it out on the dog. And two weeks ago I ran out of vanilla ice cream and struck my wife. Then I find out my wife has been dead for six years. Who the hell did I hit?

Wilford Brimley