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Family-guy

Without government, I'm free to take a lot of mescaline and drive to Vegas!

Chris

Carter: The government wants to tell you how many children you can have!
Herbert: What? No!

Tea Party, huh? Well, I'd like to be part of a movement. But what movement would want a fat guy who has opinions and hates listening?

Peter

Joe: Well, you can't fight City Hall.
Peter: Well, we'll see about that. ... City Hall knows karate.

Lois: Wow, congratulations on your grand re-opening, Mort! Looks like your customers are coming back!
Mort: Thanks, Lois! It's good to be up and gouging again!

You know what's messed up? This is all for charity. All the proceeds are going to Oxfam.

Stewie

Brian: What do you want to do for 20 minutes?
Stewie: I don't know about you, but I'm gonna work out. That's how you stay in shape. Just fit it in when you have free time Wherever you are, wherever you can...there's semen on this floor.

Oh no, he's one of those parkour free-running guys, we'll never catch him!

Stewie

Brian: You're the only one who's got the knowhow and the technology to help us track her down.
Stewie: Interesting. Last week, all my gadgets were, hooey I think was the word.
Brian: I didn't say...
Stewie: I SAID HOOEY!

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