Family Guy

Family Guy Season 2 Quotes (Page 8)

Season 2 Episode 5: "Love Thy Trophy"

Peter [about a handbag]: Oh I love you sweety. What are they like 10 bucks?
Meg: More like eleven...hundred.
Peter: Heh, you wished I loved you that much
 • Rating: Unrated

Stewie: What's that? Oh yeah. I love crack, I'm absolutly coo-coo for crack
 • Rating: Unrated

[After seeing the social worker give Mrs. Stevens back her baby]
Chris: So this is where babies come from?
Brian: Yes Chris, this is exactly where babies come from.
Chris [to Lois]: You told me I came out of your vagina
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Stewie [in foster care]: God! Do you people speak every language except english? Yo quiero pancakes! Done ma pancakes! Click click bloody click pancakes!
 • Rating: Unrated

Joe: Peter wanted the trophy the most.
Peter: I couldn't have stolen the trophy. Last night I was stealing Joe's ladder so I could steal the trophy tonight.
Lois: Peter!
Peter: What? It's a ladder, he's not gonna use it. That's like taking a watch off a dead guy
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter: You told them that we cheat on our taxes, steal lawn mowers, and worship some guy named Stan.
Bonnie: Actually I said Satan. That must have been a typo
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Peter: And Cleveland, you're the boss because of your attention to detail. Like when we play pool, you take so long to line up your shot that I just want to crack you with a cue stick. But I don't because that would be a hate crime and I love you
 • Rating: Unrated

Brian: It's amazing, Peter. You've inspired the whole neighborhood to work together.
Peter: You know what's really amazing? I haven't brushed my teeth in three days, and no-one has said a thing
 • Rating: Unrated

Cleveland [to Joe]: Pretty high and mighty for a man who left our nation's flag out in the rain last 4th of July. That's against the law, Officer
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 2 Episode 4: "Brian in Love"

Stewie: What the hell is this?
Lois: Sweetie, that's tuna salad.
Stewie: Oh, is that what it is? Really? Because I could have sworn it was mayonnaise and cat food
 • Rating: Unrated

Lois: This could be a great chance for you two to bond.
Peter: Bond? James Bond. I'll do it
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chris [on the phone]: So, ah, what are you wearing? Wow. I bet you could see right through that.
Lois: Chris, who you talking to?
Chris: Grandma
 • Rating: Unrated

Lois: It's Stewie. He peed on the carpet.
Peter: Do I... Do I hit him?
Lois: No!
 • Rating: Unrated

Dr. Kaplan: I'd like to pat you Brian. Would that be okay? You're a good dog, Brian. A very good dog.
Brian: Keep it above the waist, Doc
 • Rating: Unrated

Tom: And now part two of our very own Asian correspondent, Tricia Takanawa's special report on sex.
Tricia: Tom, I'm standing in the bedroom of Judy and Glenn Issacs. Ten years married and still in love. What's their secret? Judy has an inoperable brain tumor the size of my fist and that just happens to be Glenn's fetish
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter: Hey Brian. How ya doin'? They let you out already?
Brian: Peter, I was in a therapy session, not a lunatic asylum
 • Rating: Unrated

Brian: My therapist thinks he's figured out what my problem is.
Peter: Oh yeah, what does Sigmund Fraud think it is?
Brian: He, ah, thinks I'm in love.
Peter: Oh my God. You can talk!
Brian: Never mind
 • Rating: Unrated

Lois: Stewie, did you unhook mommy's bra?
 • Rating: 4.6 / 5.0

Brian: Okay, just to be clear, we were talking about me being in love with you and you rejecting me, right?
Lois: Yes.
Brian: I'm just making sure.... Say we were both drunk and we knew we wouldn't remember...
Lois: Well, I'd have to be really, really... No!
 • Rating: Unrated

Stewie: You're urinating! So, it's been you all along. Oh, this is too perfect! I've been taking the blame for Rex!
 • Rating: Unrated

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