Look I'm not ready to start eating jicama or get a flat top either. Maybe in junior college.

Santana

Santana: You really need to be more careful with your leering.
Karofsky: I was just checking out what kind of jeans he was wearing.
Santana: Like that's any less gay.

Being a hot seventeen year old you can get away with or do pretty much anything you want so I kind of always assumed that people were nice and accommodating.

Quinn

I'm a closet lesbian and a judgmental bitch, which means one thing. I have awesome gaydar.

Santana

I have so much more free time now that there are four hands polishing all of my fruit.

Emma

At this school the thing that makes you different is the thing that people use to crush your spirit.

Mercedes

I'm sure that Sam has been to the doctor's office and rifled through pamphlets on mouth reductions.

Santana

Hold up, could we all just get real here for a second? I hear that Rachel has a bit of a schnoz. I mean I wouldn't know because like Medusa I try to avoid eye contact with her.

Santana

Rachel: Are you suggesting I get a nose job?
Doctor: You're sixteen right? That's when I gave my daughters theirs. It's like a right of passage for Jewish girls.

It's booty camp time!

Will

Will: What do you think of my taffy plan to raise money for Detroit
Holly: I think its as terrible has the word Brainiac. Listen, you let that crazy ex-wife of yours mess with your brain and now you think you can't dream.
Will: What should we do then?
Holly: A night of neglect.
Will: That actually sounds like my life.

Kurt Hummel Is Back At McKinley!

Kurt

Glee Season 2 Quotes

Even if your team has dropped their sequin-covered panties and urinated all over the stage like an elderly Carol Channing, they literally could not have done worse.

Sue

One girl ate a pigeon. That's how badly they wanna be Cheerios.

Sue