Turk: You're making a big mistake.
J.D.: Come on, man. Elliot and I are like best friends. We love hanging out with each other. Maybe that's love. I mean, who-who knows what love really is?
Turk: I do. J.D., when I look at Carla, I see the future. I see kids, I see minivans, I see a beer gut - on me, of course, not her.
J.D.: I hope so.

Turk: So I take it you haven't broken up with her yet.
J.D.: Yeah, I decided to stay with her forever.
Turk: That's great, dude. I know you think you're being nice, but I'm pretty sure Elliot doesn't want to spend her life with someone who doesn't love her.
J.D.: Oh, you know what? If it's okay with you, I'm gonna go ahead and take relationship advice from someone whose fiancee is currently speaking to him. Ohhhh!
Turk: Ohhhh-ho!
J.D.: Gimme some champagne! I need a victory sip!

Marco! The invite says no dates, man! NO dates!

Turk

Baby, you mean so much to me. That's why you my baby. And, yeah, there were babies before you, but I promise you, baby, you will be my baby forever, baby... Stop saying "baby"!

Turk

J.D.: Turk, I need your help, man. It's about Elliot.
Marko: Why, did you sleep with her again?
J.D.: How does everybody know about this?

Catch me, stud!... You know, most guys woulda caught me. I love that you didn't!

Elliot

J.D.'s Narration I guess the Soup Nazi was right, it is the little things that are important. Like when Elliot blows the bangs out of her face. Or how she's the only person I know who sneezes with her eyes open.
Elliot: Atchoo. Ahem. 'Scuse me.
J.D.'s Narration: And that's when I realized that I really liked all those things about Elliot, but I didn't love them... and I didn't love her.

Dr. Cox: Jordan, you are an unpredictable passionate person and you challenge me each and every day and honestly, that's the reason I can imagine being with you when I'm seventy and your sixty-five and your face is forty and your boobs are twenty-nine.
Jordan: My face will never look forty.
Dr. Cox: You're right, my bad.

I can only assume you're saying "Let me out or I'm gonna kill ya"...not gonna happen. Listen, I'm in a rare position of power here, okay? So I'm only gonna let you out if you admit that you're my mentor. I know! I know that makes you angry, but-- Uh-oh! Okay! Okay! You know, I'm fine the other way! However you wanna do--

J.D.

Oh my God that board meeting went on forever! It was so dull I had to read pamphlets just to stay awake. Good news is, don't have testicular cancer.

Jordan

J.D.'s Narration: Maybe I just don't feel I deserve someone as great as Elliot because I have low self-esteem.
Elliot: Do you know that you have really nice hands?
J.D.: "Nice"? Elliot, these are the hands of a god!
Elliot: Heh!
J.D.'s Narration: Fine, so it's not the self-esteem thing.

I don't necessarily buy into all that new agey crap. One time I saw my mom knock my father unconscious with a frying pan. You know what I did? I kept right on going with my birthday party.

Dr. Cox
Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 981 in total

Scrubs Season 3 Quotes

Then for the last time, don't stick any part of your hairless body into my business. Trust me, there is nothing for you to gain from it - because even if you went on a cruise to the most remote regions of the ocean and rescued my drowning, salt-soaked body in time to pump the sea water out of my lungs and bring me back from the brink of death I would still be upset that the first face I saw was yours.

Dr. Cox

It feels good to work as a team and gather all the pieces of the puzzle together so we can finally look Mrs. Farr in the face and tell her... we still don't know what the hell she has.

J.D.'s Narration
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