South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Quotes
Oh, they'd love it! A sport where safety is all that matters? How about we call it sarcastaball?!
Randy
Randy: Yeah, the players should all wear bras! And instead of helmets, they should wear little tin-foil hats, because you know, it's the future, and we shouldn't be so barbaric!
Principal Victoria: How will the bras and tin-foil hats make it safer?
Randy: Oh, you're all not getting it, see, while we're at it, we'll have a balloon instead of a ball, and whoever catches the ballon will tries to run while all the other players hug!
Butters: Boy, I just don't get football. Guess that's why I suck at it.
Stan: You don't suck at football, Butters. You suck at all sports.
Butters: That's true!
Don't let society dictate who you can and can't be with. Kyle, I love you man! You can run all you want, try and pretend you like girls, but dammit, when we kiss there's magic! Don't let it go, Kyle!
Cartman
Cartman: I'm a racist, huh? I'm a racist? It's how nature works, Kyle. Look, what about Luke Covina and Maria Sanchez? Is it a coincidence they ended up together?
Stan: Actually, I heard they're together because they got locked in the school gym overnight a few nights ago.
Cartman: Oh, did they? I hadn't heard about that.
Cupid Cartman: Teehee, that was us, remember, Eric?
Cartman: Shh, quiet Cupid me!
Kyle: What the hell are you doing telling people we're a gay couple?
Cartman: Oh, heard that through the grapevine, did you?
Nicole: Look! Somebody left a deli platter. And board games. And massage oil.
Token: Oh. Good.
Cartman: Guys! Guys! Get outside! It's the Batmobile! Batmobile you guys!
Jimmy: I don't see a Batmobile.
Love is like taking a dump, Butters. Sometimes it works itself out. But sometimes, you need to give it a nice hard slimy push.
Cartman
Anyway, thanks a lot, and stay away from my man, bitch.
Cartman
Aw, Token's shy! Oh my god, that is adorable.
Cartman
The hardest part about it is knowing you can't take it back! It was a 5th generation nano, so I can't trade it in anywhere!
Stan
