Darcy: Wow, you really are 10. I thought you were just stupid.
Bart: I'm 10 and stupid!

Lisa: Show's over, let's go.
Homer: What's your hurry?
Lisa: Well, some of my report, um, wasn't thoroughly fact checked.
Homer: (Laughs) My little girl's just like CBS News.

Bart: I want a license.
Mayor Quimby: To kill?
Bart: No, to drive!

Bart: You know, I thought Darcy and I would be like a real married couple. Instead, we just ended up fighting all the time.
Homer: Yeah, how 'bout that?

I need a ride. I think I'm in Chinatown. (a mouse run in the street) No, not our Chinatown.

Homer

Bart, take these volleyballs, fill them up, and throw them over the prison wall to create chaos and confusion.

Homer

(calling Bart) Bart! This is a matter of life and death! What is the difference between 'ketchup' and 'catsup'? (Bart throws the cell phone away.) They're gonna cut my head off!

Homer

Wait, wait. Although she is not one of our people this young lady has shown the courage we Native Americans cherish, and who can blame her for wanting to be one of us? We have a noble heritage and cheekbones to die for.

Spokesman at National Tribal Conference

Homer: Son, one day you're going to be a great father.
Bart: Aww, and someday you'll be one too.
Homer: Thanks boy, heh heh heh heh heh.

Darcy: I'm very religious that way.
Bart: How religious can you be if you're pregnant.
(Darcy slaps Bart)
Bart: Good answer.

Homer: You know, my great-great grandmother was an Indian. I guess I should've mentioned that before, huh?
Lisa: Yes, you should have!

In a world of thirty-one flavors, we're the cup of water they rinse the scoops in. Grampa out.

Grampa

The Simpsons Quotes

Larry: What you got riding on this?
Homer: My daughter.
Larry: What a gambler!

Maggie? Oh, you must be sick. Let's see, what's old Dr. Washburn prescibe? Do you have dropsy? The grippe? Scofula? The vapors? Jungle rot? Dandy fever? Poor man's gout? Housemaid's knee? Climatic poopow? The staggers? Dum-dum fever?

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