The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular The Simpsons Quotes
I don't sign anything, unless I pretend to read it. (pretending to read a contract) Hamburger, hamburger, hamburger, hamburger, looks good to me.
Cletus
Then I had this crazy dream that my family were all just cartoon characters and that our success led to some crazy propaganda network called Fox News.
Bart
Lisa: You're gonna regret the day you were born.
Bart: I already do, it's too close to Christmas.
Put a James Taylor CD in the stereo so they think it was a suicide.
Homer
You two look good - open casket good.
Grampa
I'm not a hairdresser. I just put a new lid on a couple of trash cans.
Homer
Newsweek magazine did say it's good to change careers... right after they laid off all their editors.
Marge
That theremin has paid for itself time and time again.
Principal Skinner
It's one of those unsolved mysteries, like how do my clothes get cleaned and get back in my dresser?
Bart
Like Mozart and Johnny Knoxville, my genius can not be stopped.
Homer
First five customers get a discount, next five get to hear secrets from the first five.
Julio
Marge: Homey, you sure know how to please a woman.
Homer: As long as it doesn't involve losing weight or changing my pants.
